Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sunday Morning Gloatmeal

TebowISAIAHI saw this picture of Tim Tebow on the Interwebz, and looked up the verse.

...But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Note that it doesn’t say anything in there about “verily, they will not get their asses whupped by the New England Patriots.”

And that is exactly what happened last night when Tebow’s Broncos went to Foxboro. Tom Brady and the Patriots didn’t just beat them; they methodically tore apart their offense, their defense, and pretty much every shred of their dignity. I’ve never been a Patriots fan (although I respect Tom Brady and think he’s an incredible player...they’ve just knocked my Colts out of the playoffs too often), but last night I was cheering for them as they demolished the Broncos 45-10.

Here’s why I am going to gloat about this, and why I don’t feel sorry for Tim Tebow. As I wrote about the other day, he wears his faith on his sleeve and although he can’t get away with painting Bible verses in his eyeblack anymore (that’s not allowed in the NFL), he still thanks his lord after every win, and literally takes a knee after every touchdown. I’ll give the guy credit: he really does seem to be a decent guy, doesn’t seem to be just giving lip service to his faith, and doesn’t seem to be a hypocrite about it. But to paraphrase an old saying, you live by the faith, you die by the faith.

Because he IS so vocal about his beliefs, he’s drawn much attention to himself. After a string of unlikely wins, some people were saying that maybe God really was intervening on Tebow’s behalf. As I said in my previous entry, the absurdity of thinking that any deity is interested in a football game just boggles my mind, and I find it offensive in a broader sense. First that anyone would actually pray for their team to win, and second that anyone would find worthy of worship a deity who thinks it’s more important that Tebow gets his win than alleviating starvation and suffering around the world. I mean, really...if you have that kind of power, and you spend your time influencing games instead of helping people who are suffering, you’re kind of a douche.

Anyway, so Tebow’s got everyone talking about his lord and about his faith and all this stuff. But this time, it seems that his lord was out of town, or maybe his DirecTV went out or something, because it looks like he wasn’t paying attention to the game. The Broncos didn’t just lose; they lost in a spectacular fashion. Will Tebow think about this? Will he think, “You know, maybe I should just play the game and work on getting better and not draw this kind of attention to my faith,” or even “You know, maybe God was trying to tell me to shut up and work on my game”? I doubt it. There will be no lessons learned here. Instead of thinking that maybe his god doesn’t care about the game, he’ll think something like “Okay, God didn’t help me this time, but he will next time.” Whatever.

In the meantime, you’ve got some people thinking that this was a game of good vs evil. Yes, an acquaintance of a friend really thought that evil (Tom Brady, who they think made some bad choices when it came to his dating life) triumphed over good (the saintly Tim Tebow) in this game. It’s laughable, it really is...but it’s also horrible that someone would judge Tom Brady as evil—not just having poor judgment, not just being kind of a playah, but actual spawn-of-Satan EVIL
because he was trying to beat Tim Tebow in a divisional playoff game. A football game, people. FOOTBALL. GAME.

So I don’t feel sorry for Tebow. He brought this upon himself. You know who I do feel sorry for? The other Broncos players who have to put up with all this attention paid to Tebow and his religion. There were plenty of people last night who were cheering for the Broncos to lose. I’ve never hated the Broncos. They’re not my team, and the Colts rarely play them, so I have nothing against them. But I was rooting for them to lose, and I laughed when they lost badly. Not because of any of the other players but because of Tebow’s self-centered assumption that his god gives a rat’s ass about whether he wins or loses. I enjoyed the righteous smackdown. If Tebow takes anything away from this, I hope it’s that he should just shut the hell up and play football.


  1. I respect you and legitimately love you as my friend, but I must disagree with you, without reservation.

  2. We should make t-shirts that say "just shut the hell up and play football!"

    You know how I feel about conspicuous worship- it's like taking a shit in front of others! It should be a private moment between you and your diety... I don't want to watch!

  3. I have to disagree with Mark and agree with Ginger. Serves Tebow right for being such a braggart. Just wait until he plays the bears! I think we all know whose side God would be on there.
    "From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. 'Go on up, you baldhead!' they said. 'Go on up, you baldhead!' He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the LORD. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths." — II Kings 2:23-24
    Just saying...

  4. Separation of Religion and Football!


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