The Beguiled: Revisited

Come all you young fellows take warning by me

Don't go for a soldier, don't join no army

For the dove she will leave you, the raven will come

And death will come marching at the beat of a drum

~~ “Dove She Is A Pretty Bird” Unknown (sung by Clint Eastwood in the 1971 movie)

As soon as I heard that there was going to be a remake of “The Beguiled,” I knew I had to see it. I hadn’t even heard who was going to be in it, let alone seen a trailer, but since the original movie from 1971 is one of my all-time favorite movies, this was a must-see for me.

Unfortunately, despite over 50 screens in our area, not a single one of them was showing the movie! What the hell?? But there is a happy ending. We just happened to have a week in Kansas City planned, so last night was our chance to see it. We even got to see it at a classic theater in the Westport area, the Tivoli!

When a favorite movie is remade, dangers abound. Some of the portrayals of characters are so iconic that you can’t imagine anyone else in the role. (This is why I have never seen the remake of “Psycho.” My favorite movie EVER. Vince Effin’ Vaughn as Norman Bates? After Anthony Perkins? Are you KIDDING ME?? ARGH! Oddly enough, I loved Freddie Highmore’s portrayal of Norman in the TV series “Bates Motel,” but I’ve written about that before.) Sometimes something is just so right the first time that you don’t see why a remake is necessary. (For me, that would be the remake of “Carrie.” Brian De Palma’s version was perfect.)

So I was trepidatious about the remake of “The Beguiled.” I loved it from the first time I saw it on late-night TV. I was probably in junior high, and here was a young, absolutely gorgeous Clint Eastwood as a wounded Union soldier taken in by a Southern girls’ school. It’s been quite some time since the ladies of the school have enjoyed male company (said in my best Southern drawl), so you can imagine how things go. One of the teachers falls in love with him; the headmistress of the school is reminded of her brother and their relationship which was a little more than brother and sister, if you get my drift; one of the older students wants merely to bed him and learn about a man’s body; and then young, sweet Amy, the girl who finds him in the woods, sees him as a rather romantic figure, someone she has a bit of a crush on...but she isn’t quite old enough yet to understand why she loves “Mr. McB.”

Yowza! What’s not to love? Southern Gothic at its absolute best. It is dark and twisted and sexy and occasionally funny and so much fun.

I was happy when I saw the trailer for the remake. It looked like they had the general atmosphere right. When it finally came out, I started hearing great things about it, that Sofia Coppola had directed it perfectly. So I started feeling a little less trepidatious. Colin Farrell as Corporal John McBurney (Clint Eastwood’s role)? I can work with that. Nicole Kidman as Miss Martha Farnsworth, the headmistress? Not a huge fan of Nicole, but okay. Kirsten Dunst as the young teacher Edwina? Yes! I like Kirsten Dunst. Elle Fanning as the nubile student? (Carol in the original, Alicia in the remake.) Okay, I’m game.

The new cast did an absolutely fantastic job. Kidman was wonderful, playing Miss Martha with a mixture of strength and desire and determination. There’s a great scene where she gives McBurney a sponge bath and gets all het up and sweaty. The simmering sexuality of this handsome man in a girls' school is a perfectly delicious tension. Colin Farrell was very good, with the extra added bonus of an Irish accent. His McBurney came over from Dublin and went right into the Union army. But I have to say that Clint Eastwood is still THE John McBurney for me. Eastwood wins this battle.

*Mild spoilers ahead*

They make a few minor changes, like leaving out Miss Martha’s incestuous relationship with her brother. That’s a shame, because it added a layer of gothic creepiness to the story. I also missed the presence of Hallie, the slave in the original. I think that was an important part of the story, to show why the war was being fought. But other than that, it adhered fairly closely to the original.

The true star for me was the plantation house that served as the school as well as the land itself. I spent a few summers when I was in college in Georgia when my folks had a place there. Coppola captures perfectly the sluggish heat of a Southern summer. The humidity, the angle of the sun through the trees, the buzzing of the cicadas. There are gorgeous shots of pathways turned into tunnels by overhanging trees dripping with Spanish moss. The girls work in the garden, Alicia (AKA Carol) leaning lazily on her hoe, just feeling too damned hot to work anymore and she’s not cut out for this kind of work, anyway. The flickering candlelight in the columned house and the knock on the door of passing troops. Will it be friend or foe? Amy wandering barefoot in the woods, picking mushrooms and finding wounded Yanks. (I never found a Yank in the woods in Georgia...we were the Yanks!)

It has to be very difficult to capture a particular ambiance on screen. Coppola managed to do it so perfectly that I could almost feel the heat and humidity of my long-ago Georgia summers.

I absolutely loved this movie. I still love the original and will happily watch both many times in the coming years.

Thank you, Sofia Coppola, for not ruining one of “my” movies!

Towards a more perfect union

When a Nation cries

His tears fall down like missiles from the skies

Justice looked into Independence's eyes

Can you make everything alright?

And can you keep your old Nation warm tonight?

~~ “Justice and Independence ‘85” by John Mellencamp

This morning, an article popped up in my feed. It was titled “Is Patriotism Possible in Trump’s America?”, written by Jesse Berney for Rolling Stone. I highly recommend reading it. I was so struck by it that I posted it on Twitter and Facebook, and judging by the likes and retweets (including from the author), it struck a chord in others, too.

The premise is that many of us are feeling demoralized at what is happening in our country right now. We feel we have someone holding the highest office in the land who is neither qualified or intelligent or stable enough to hold that office. It’s kind of hard to be patriotic when you feel like an Ugly American, you know?

But the article states exactly WHY it is important for us to love our country. We want to see it do well, but we also want to make sure that we continue to work towards equality and justice for all. We want to see people get a hand up when they need it, and we want to see people held accountable when they do harm to others or to our country, no matter their status.

I’ve never been the type who was “my country right or wrong.” We’ve done plenty of horrible shit in our time and there was nothing ‘right’ about it at all. Because we care, we work towards progress. We work for fairness and we work for justice. We are and always have been a work in progress...an effort towards a “more perfect union.”

I’m tired of being labeled as unpatriotic because of my criticisms of the current occupant of the White House. Or of the Bush administration, which misled the American people and got us into a stupid war. (All wars are stupid, although some are justified, but that is one of the stupidest.) I’m tired of being told that I need to “respect the office.” How about this? I’ll start respecting the office again when HE does. This guy is one of the worst things to happen to the office, to the presidency, and to the world. I will never stop saying that.

I am a patriot. I love my country for the good it has done and can do in the world. I love it for our great achievements, our innovation, and our innate sense of goodness. (I still believe that.) We are experiencing a pretty serious glitch right now, but I am confident that we will fix it. 

Happy birthday, America. If I criticize you, it is only because I want to keep fighting to make you better for everyone and to make you continue to show the world that we are a force for good, not for ill. I haven’t given up on us yet and I hope the rest of the world won’t, either.

A Nationwide Insanity

Jeebus Effin’ Christ, I am so sick of writing about this.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Here.

And here.

With every mass shooting we have in this country, my outrage and frustration grow. This keeps happening over and over and OVER and we still cannot bring ourselves to pass common sense gun laws, despite the majority of Americans favoring them. Even Republicans!

Congresswoman shot in the head? Nope.

Dozens shot and killed in a theater? Nope.

Twenty kids dead in their elementary school? Nope.

Nine dead in a South Carolina church? Nope.

Fifty dead in a nightclub in Orlando? Nope.

And now they—Republican House members—have been targeted. Several of their own were shot. The response?

They will not do anything to weaken the 2nd Amendment.

Some of the members will start carrying guns.

I honestly have to wonder just what the fuck is wrong with them. How can you look at what is going on here and look at our rates of gun violence vs other countries and NOT COMPREHEND that we have a major problem with guns? What is this bizarre fetish that we have with guns?

It is SICK. It is not normal, and it is not healthy. This isn’t the fucking Wild West and these open carry assholes are not fucking Wyatt Earp.

If you want to have guns to hunt, I support that. Well, I don’t support hunting. I think it’s gross and cruel and it makes me sick. I get it, though. But no one needs to be carrying guns around and it is about goddamn time that we start passing some common sense gun laws in this country.

You’re all so scared of terrorist attacks? From 2001 to 2014, for every life claimed by terrorism (including the 9/11 attack), over ONE THOUSAND died from gun violence. This is not just a matter of domestic terrorism and mass shootings, it is domestic violence, murders, and suicide. We have a major problem in this country and as long as our legislators continue to kiss National Rifle Association ass, this will not be solved.

The NRA is a boil on the ass of humanity. They don’t give a flying FUCK about dead kids or legislators who get shot in the head or a bunch of gays getting killed in a nightclub. All they care about is the money they can rake in with gun sales and lobbying.

As far as I’m concerned, they are a hate group, and they have so much blood on their hands that those damned spots will never be gotten out.

A Well Respected Man

And he's oh, so good,

And he's oh, so fine,

And he's oh, so healthy,

In his body and his mind.

He's a well respected man about town,

Doing the best things so conservatively.

~~ “A Well Respected Man” by The Kinks

My, my, what an interesting week.

Like millions all over the country, I was glued to our TV set (not literally) Thursday morning as I watched former FBI Director James Comey have his say when he appeared before the Senate Intelligence Committee. (I really wish Senator Al Franken were on that committee.) It promised to be quite a spectacle, and it didn’t disappoint.

Let me preface this by saying that while plenty of my friends hate Comey for the way he handled the Hillary e-mail brouhaha, I’ve always had mixed feelings about it. I didn’t like it, either, and I think it may have played a part in her EC loss, but I don’t think it’s fair to lay it all on him. There were many factors involved. I also read quite a bit about his thinking, and I get where he was coming from. His goal was to protect the Justice Department and the FBI from any allegations of wrongdoing or coercion or undue influence or whatever you want to call it. Of course, it turned out that it probably did influence things somewhat, but I just don’t think we can lay it all at his feet. I remember talking to Ken about it at the time, and we agreed that he made the decision that he had to make. The guy was between a rock and a hard place. Neither of us cared for it much, but we understood his reasoning from a logical viewpoint. I felt then, and still feel, that Comey was a man of integrity.

I know that some of my friends on the left will disagree with me. Hell, probably plenty of people on the right will disagree with me. If you’re pissing everyone off equally, doesn’t that mean you’re nonpartisan? I don’t know. But really, I think the guy is the real deal and genuinely wanted to follow the law and fight crime. One of the Good Guys.

As for the hearing...holy shit! I was so riveted that I didn’t even get up to take a bathroom break, and since I’d fixed myself a Bloody Mary, things were getting quite urgent by the end of those two and a half hours! It was absolutely fascinating and Comey was beyond impressive. He was a cool customer who came across as highly competent, committed to the truth and the law, self-deprecating, but obviously intelligent and sharp as a tack. I enjoyed it so much that I watched it again via video from another network, and this one included lots of dramatic closeups of Comey’s face. That was fascinating in itself because you could see his rapid eye movements and his nods as the Senators were asking their questions. He was like a machine processing everything and figuring out how he was going to answer. Probably exactly how he reacted when sitting with the Yam, figuring out how he was going to answer those inappropriate requests.

I’ve said from the very beginning of this whole mess that the Yam picked the wrong FBI director to fuck with. This guy is a true professional who knows how things work.

Speaking of inappropriate requests, I’ve seen multiple stories equating how Comey felt in these encounters with his boss with how women sometimes feel in the workplace when we are faced with such comments. It even extended to the hearing, when several Senators—including a couple of female Senators!—asked him why he didn’t do more, say more, speak up, fight back at the time. Amazingly enough, James Comey was victim-shamed. As one Twitter comment said, “Mr. Comey, what were you wearing at the time?” The awful truth is that anyone, no matter their gender or any other qualifier, can be subjected to feeling that their job hinges upon how they respond to the advances of their superior. I think plenty of us have been in such a situation and it can be very uncomfortable and you try to tread as lightly as possible. Imagine that your boss holds the most powerful position in the country. How would you react?

Comey did the smart thing and documented everything. Ken and I have both been in that situation, too. His situation did turn into one where he had to give a deposition and his notes were invaluable. I give that advice to anyone having issues at work. Document, document, document! Of course, Comey didn’t need my advice. He was the freakin’ FBI chief, so he knows about documentation.

He also knows how to play the long game. One of the most fascinating things that came out of the hearing, at least to me, was that he said yes, I gave my notes about the meeting to a friend and asked him to give it to a reporter in the hopes that a special prosecutor would be appointed. He just flat-out said it! And that is exactly what happened. Checkmate, em-effers!

Now the Yaministration is trying to portray Comey as a “leaker.” Good luck with that, you incompetent dolts. He was a private citizen—you know, ‘cause you fired him—and he was careful to ensure that nothing included in his memo was classified. The Yam maintains that Comey is lying, which means that he is accusing him of perjury. I think only the most rabid Yampeople would look at the Yam and at Comey and conclude that the Yam is more trustworthy. Comey will win that contest every single time among the majority of the American people.

Also, James Comey is hot. Everyone knows that intelligence and integrity are attractive. Two of the many reasons I married Ken.

The Return of the Yam: A Vignette

After the senior staff draws straws as to who will meet the Resident when he gets back from his trip, the one with the shortest [ahem] is Steve Bannon. He awaits his leader’s return in the Oval Office.

The Yam enters, glares at Bannon, and stalks over to the desk. He plops down into the chair, which gives out a loud and alarming wheeze.

Bannon: Welcome back, sir.

The Yam: What are you doing here?

Bannon: I'm here to welcome you back, brief you on what has happened in your absence, and hear about your trip.

The Yam: [waving his hand as if to brush it all away] Whatever. Where’s Spicey?

Bannon: In his room, sir. He hasn’t come out for days. When we knock on the door, he just yells at us to go away.

The Yam: [smiles for the first time] So he’s upset that he didn’t get to meet the Pope?

Bannon: He seems to be, yes. Reince said he heard him crying the other night.

The Yam: [rubs his tiny hands together] Excellent. I could have taken him, you know, but I knew how much he wanted it. A sign of weakness. I hope he learned his lesson. The Pope was a loser, anyway. As a present, he gave me some kind of paper to read, said he’d written it himself. What kind of a gift is that? Everyone knows I don’t read anything longer than a page. Spicey didn’t miss anything.

Bannon: Yes, sir.  So how was your trip?

The Yam: [he loses his smile] Those damn Europians. Did you see how they treated me?

Bannon: In what regard, sir?

The Yam: When I walked in the room, they acted like they’d just stepped in dogshit! Very, very rude. Losers. They would have lost World War Two if we hadn’t helped them out.

Bannon: Well, sir, Germany DID lose World War—

The Yam: And that French guy! Did you see the way he shook my hand? Like he was trying to dominate me or something.

Bannon: [silent]

The Yam: By the way, get me some BenGay. My hand hurts.

Bannon: Yes sir, I’ll get it for you as soon as we finish here.

The Yam: And Merkel. Boy, isn’t she a piece of work? Her and her pantsuits. Her and Hillary would have gotten along just fine, I bet. But I won. Have you seen the electoral college map? Here’s a copy.

Bannon: Yes, I’ve seen it, sir. Many times.

The Yam: Whatever. Merkel kept staring at me with this weird look on her face. I saw her whispering to the French guy and then they laughed. They’re mean.

Bannon: Yes sir, they are.

The Yam: Mean, mean people. They didn’t let me sit with them at lunch. They all sat around and said there were no seats open. But there was! I saw an empty chair. Merkel said it was saved for my missing dignity. What does that even mean?

Bannon: [silent]

The Yam: And that French guy. Did I mention that handshake?

Bannon: Yes sir, you did.

The Yam: I saw him and the Canuck standing over there and talking French talk. They kept looking at me, too. Then they’d laugh.

Bannon: I’m sure it was some sort of French joke, sir, nothing about you.

The Yam: And they thought they looked so good, all trim in their suits, thinking they were hot shit. I think Merkel was flirting with them, but they wouldn’t go for that. She’s barely a 4.

Bannon: Sir, I—

The Yam: They don’t look nearly as good as Jared, anyway. He’s much better-looking. Bigger hands, too.

Bannon: Sir—

The Yam: I showed ‘em all who was boss, though. Did you see me shove that Negro guy out of the way? Ha! That was great.

 Bannon: Sir, that was the Prime Minister of Montenegro.

The Yam: Whatever. I pushed him out of the way like the loser he is. They’re all losers.

Bannon: Sir, I need to tell you about—

The Yam: By the way, Ivanka and Jared had a really nice time. I don’t know about Melania, she wouldn’t talk to me much. She must be on her period. But Ivanka and Jared had fun! I bought Jared some treat in Italy that he really liked. What was it, Jell-O? Gelatin? I forget, but you should have seen his little face light up. He’s a good boy.

Bannon: Sir, I really need to tell you—

The Yam: In fact, Jared wanted me to ask you about the news from while we were gone. Did anything happen? He wants me to email him.

Bannon: [silence]

The Yam: Well?

Bannon: Sir, I’m going to go get that BenGay for you now. You just sit and...get some rest, okay?

The Yam: Cool. I’m exhausted. Who knew foreign trips were so complicated?

 

~~

FINIS

Health Care For All!

Love is but a song to sing

Fear's the way we die

You can make the mountains ring

Or make the angels cry

Though the bird is on the wing

And you may not know why

Come on people now

Smile on your brother

Everybody get together

Try to love one another

Right now

~~ “Get Together” by The Youngbloods

I’ve been laying low lately. We spent a fun week in Vegas, I’ve been reading a lot, and with the shit show going on in the Yamistration, I just haven’t felt like writing much. Some days it’s all I can do to not Hulk-smash everything in sight. Sometimes it is best to just hunker down, and as REO Speedwagon says, I’ve been riding the storm out. As much as I can, anyway.

Today was a lesson in how engagement can energize, inspire, and strengthen our resolve.

I headed to downtown Mishawaka with Shane and Matt to join a protest outside of the office of our so-called representative, Jackie Walorski. I say ‘so-called’ because she doesn’t really spend a whole lot of time with her constituents, especially the ones who didn’t vote for her, so I guess she only wants to represent part of us. Hmph.

Anyway, this was a protest organized by Indivisible Indiana District 2 and the Northern Indiana Community Coalition for Health Care. The latter organized the recent town hall meeting concerning the Affordable Care Act and the so-called American Health Care Act, and although Jackie was invited numerous times, she didn’t show up and didn’t even bother to respond yes or no if she would be attending. I don’t think she understands the meaning of the word ‘representative.’ But we had the town hall without her.

Today’s protest was termed a “Die-In.” The goal was to get at least 80 people to show up, with 80 representing the number of people in Indiana District 2 who would die each year without the guarantees of coverage by the ACA. We all held signs shaped like tombstones with various slogans about who would suffer if the ACA is repealed and the AHCA takes its place. The last time I looked at the sign-up sheet, we had around 60 people, but the turnout surpassed the goal. We had over 100 people there! Not bad for 4:30 on an overcast weekday afternoon. (The rain even held off until we were done!)

We were all fired up and happy to be there. Everyone was friendly and peaceful. The overwhelming majority of people driving by honked and gave us the thumbs up. (Yes, those were thumbs, not another digit.) A couple of people drove by and gave us some grief, but they were definitely in the minority.

The most memorable of those was when a guy in a blue car pulled up directly in front of where I was standing with Shane and Matt, and stopped because of a red light. The guy turned to us and started saying “Trump for America! Trump for America!” I don’t know what came over me, but I started yelling back, “Health care for all! Health care for all!” Me and the guy kept at this for a few moments, and then a lady behind me took up my chant. Shane and Matt joined in, and soon our entire group of over one hundred people was chanting “Health care for all!” at this guy. He tried keeping up his chant for a bit but we kept chanting louder and louder...and then here was the best moment. He finally turned away, put his hands on his steering wheel, shut his mouth, and faced straight ahead. But he couldn’t go anywhere...because the light was still red.

[falling over laughing]

So he had to sit there with all of us chanting “Health care for all!” at him, probably thinking, “When is this fucking light going to turn green?” When it finally did, you can probably guess what he did. Yep, he flipped us the bird as he drove off. We all cracked up.

Somebody got owned! Man, what a douchebag.

Our organizer gave a rousing speech, we sang a song, and then we all filed into Jackie’s office to drop off our postcards that stated why we are against the AHCA or support the ACA. We weren’t there long, but we made our presence known, and we had plenty of traffic driving by and seeing us. On the way back to the car, we stopped off at Smith’s for a beer and a bite to eat and discussed things and had some laughs. It was a good day!

I feel reenergized. It is very easy to insulate ourselves against what is going on and to withdraw. That holds especially true for introverts like me. (I know that Shane is, too. Matt? Maybe a bit, but not to the extent that Shane and I are.) I think it is important to make an effort to get out every once in a while, connect with others, and affirm our commitment to resist and change the current administration, locally and nationally.

Being a part of this peaceful protest and talking with others who are committed to this cause really gave me a boost and made me want to continue to be involved to the extent that I can. I also enjoyed learning that I could confront others peacefully but forcefully. I didn’t flip the dude in the car off or call him names and I didn’t call his candidate names. I just affirmed my support for health care for all. And I’ll be damned if others didn’t join in and we got him to shut up. 

That is empowering as fuck.

I encourage others to get out as much as they can and check into local groups who are involved in protests and activism. Things are popping up everywhere and there are plenty of things you can do, big and small.

We are all in this together and we will help each other get through it!