Health Care For All!

Love is but a song to sing

Fear's the way we die

You can make the mountains ring

Or make the angels cry

Though the bird is on the wing

And you may not know why

Come on people now

Smile on your brother

Everybody get together

Try to love one another

Right now

~~ “Get Together” by The Youngbloods

I’ve been laying low lately. We spent a fun week in Vegas, I’ve been reading a lot, and with the shit show going on in the Yamistration, I just haven’t felt like writing much. Some days it’s all I can do to not Hulk-smash everything in sight. Sometimes it is best to just hunker down, and as REO Speedwagon says, I’ve been riding the storm out. As much as I can, anyway.

Today was a lesson in how engagement can energize, inspire, and strengthen our resolve.

I headed to downtown Mishawaka with Shane and Matt to join a protest outside of the office of our so-called representative, Jackie Walorski. I say ‘so-called’ because she doesn’t really spend a whole lot of time with her constituents, especially the ones who didn’t vote for her, so I guess she only wants to represent part of us. Hmph.

Anyway, this was a protest organized by Indivisible Indiana District 2 and the Northern Indiana Community Coalition for Health Care. The latter organized the recent town hall meeting concerning the Affordable Care Act and the so-called American Health Care Act, and although Jackie was invited numerous times, she didn’t show up and didn’t even bother to respond yes or no if she would be attending. I don’t think she understands the meaning of the word ‘representative.’ But we had the town hall without her.

Today’s protest was termed a “Die-In.” The goal was to get at least 80 people to show up, with 80 representing the number of people in Indiana District 2 who would die each year without the guarantees of coverage by the ACA. We all held signs shaped like tombstones with various slogans about who would suffer if the ACA is repealed and the AHCA takes its place. The last time I looked at the sign-up sheet, we had around 60 people, but the turnout surpassed the goal. We had over 100 people there! Not bad for 4:30 on an overcast weekday afternoon. (The rain even held off until we were done!)

We were all fired up and happy to be there. Everyone was friendly and peaceful. The overwhelming majority of people driving by honked and gave us the thumbs up. (Yes, those were thumbs, not another digit.) A couple of people drove by and gave us some grief, but they were definitely in the minority.

The most memorable of those was when a guy in a blue car pulled up directly in front of where I was standing with Shane and Matt, and stopped because of a red light. The guy turned to us and started saying “Trump for America! Trump for America!” I don’t know what came over me, but I started yelling back, “Health care for all! Health care for all!” Me and the guy kept at this for a few moments, and then a lady behind me took up my chant. Shane and Matt joined in, and soon our entire group of over one hundred people was chanting “Health care for all!” at this guy. He tried keeping up his chant for a bit but we kept chanting louder and louder...and then here was the best moment. He finally turned away, put his hands on his steering wheel, shut his mouth, and faced straight ahead. But he couldn’t go anywhere...because the light was still red.

[falling over laughing]

So he had to sit there with all of us chanting “Health care for all!” at him, probably thinking, “When is this fucking light going to turn green?” When it finally did, you can probably guess what he did. Yep, he flipped us the bird as he drove off. We all cracked up.

Somebody got owned! Man, what a douchebag.

Our organizer gave a rousing speech, we sang a song, and then we all filed into Jackie’s office to drop off our postcards that stated why we are against the AHCA or support the ACA. We weren’t there long, but we made our presence known, and we had plenty of traffic driving by and seeing us. On the way back to the car, we stopped off at Smith’s for a beer and a bite to eat and discussed things and had some laughs. It was a good day!

I feel reenergized. It is very easy to insulate ourselves against what is going on and to withdraw. That holds especially true for introverts like me. (I know that Shane is, too. Matt? Maybe a bit, but not to the extent that Shane and I are.) I think it is important to make an effort to get out every once in a while, connect with others, and affirm our commitment to resist and change the current administration, locally and nationally.

Being a part of this peaceful protest and talking with others who are committed to this cause really gave me a boost and made me want to continue to be involved to the extent that I can. I also enjoyed learning that I could confront others peacefully but forcefully. I didn’t flip the dude in the car off or call him names and I didn’t call his candidate names. I just affirmed my support for health care for all. And I’ll be damned if others didn’t join in and we got him to shut up. 

That is empowering as fuck.

I encourage others to get out as much as they can and check into local groups who are involved in protests and activism. Things are popping up everywhere and there are plenty of things you can do, big and small.

We are all in this together and we will help each other get through it!

Reckoning Day

And this is a call to arms

This is a call to hands

This is a call to the voices and the minds

Of the people in every land

~~ “Reckoning Day” by The Rainmakers

Today we attended a town hall meeting focused on health care with our District 2 Representative, Jackie Walorski.

Except Jackie didn’t show.

We knew she wouldn’t. She was invited numerous times and not only didn’t she have the balls to show, she didn’t even have the balls to RSVP.

But we carried on without her. It was a moderated town hall, with a panel of folks who deal with health care issues in their jobs, and I was delighted to see my own doctor there! (She had a great moment, too...more about that later.)

The most compelling part of the meeting was the testimonials from various citizens—all constituents of Rep. Walorski—that told about their experiences with health care and how the Affordable Care Act helped them. A woman whose daughter is disabled; a woman who, at a very young age, was diagnosed with breast cancer; a molecular biologist who spoke about the importance of federally-funded medical research; a woman who had premature triplets; and our friend Cassie, who despite her fear of public speaking and an anxiety attack, stood up and told her story about her own risky pregnancy and the premature birth of her son. I am so proud of Cassie for having the courage to speak about this!

Every question is being sent to Rep. Walorski and if she has a shred of decency, she will read them. I hope the organizers send her the video, too, because she needs to see it. She needs to realize that she works for us. The fact that she refuses to listen to her constituents is unacceptable. The crowd was well-behaved but there was a palpable sense of anger that we feel we are not being heard.

As for my doctor, as if I didn’t love her enough already! She has been a wonderful doctor, responsive to my questions and encouraging in my efforts to stay healthy. Seeing her there as part of the panel let me know that she is on the side of her patients and not happy with the efforts to repeal the ACA. She had one of the coolest responses of the entire meeting, when one of the mediators read a question from the audience. The gist of it was that the Hyde Amendment is already in place to ensure that federal funds are not used for

abortions; the Republican party continues to push for the defunding of Planned Parenthood, which means that thousands of Hoosiers from rural areas would have no access to basic medical care. Can anyone on the panel explain that thinking? The panel hemmed and hawed and looked at each other, and then my doctor pulled the microphone toward her and said…

“No.”

The crowd erupted in applause and I elbowed Ken and said, “See why I love her??”

If I were Jackie Walorski, I’d be pretty darn scared about 2018. Ignore your constituents at your own risk.

Down the Rabbit Hole

When logic and proportion

Have fallen sloppy dead

And the White Knight is talking backwards

And the Red Queen's off with her head

~~ “White Rabbit,” Jefferson Airplane

Today my friend Dan said to me, “I never thought I’d see you at a Cruz rally!”

Neither did I, Dan. Neither did I.

In an unusual and unlikely turn of events, Indiana is surprisingly important in this year’s primary race, at least the Republican one (Hillary’s got it wrapped up on the Democratic side...it’s all over but the shoutin’). With our late primary date, we usually don’t get a whole lot of attention, either from the media or from the candidates. Getting all this attention is a mixed bag. We have to deal with phone calls (yay for caller ID!) and lots of political ads, but we also get candidates actually stumping in our state. That doesn’t happen very often, and for a political junkie like me, it’s total catnip.

So when my friend Cassie posted that she got a ticket for the Cruz rally here in our town, I thought, “You know what? I’m going, too!” (Neither of us are Cruz supporters or Republicans, by the way.) I got my free ticket and headed up late this afternoon.

It was quite an experience. The first thing I saw when I walked in was that line of posters up there. It was truly a WTF moment. (I snagged one of the double-sided posters on the way out. How could I not?) It was a good-sized crowd, although not a particularly large place, and although Hoosier Nice isn’t quite at the level of Minnesota Nice, it’s pretty damn close. Everyone was polite and nice. And very pale. Seriously, I think I saw maybe two people of color at the most. Not a diverse crowd at all, although Cassie and I were surprised at the number of younger people.

I was happy to find Cassie right away and meet a long-time Facebook friend in real life! Thanks for saving me a seat, Cassie! I also found Dan pretty quickly, as he was part of the press cadre and was busy talking to people and getting some pictures. We didn’t get to talk for long, but agreed that we need to make some time to do that! He snapped a couple of pictures of me and Cassie.

The rally began with a prayer—ahem—and the pledge of allegiance. Cassie and I stood but remained silent. I find the reciting of the pledge of allegiance kind of odd, although I know it’s common in both Republican and Democratic rallies. I’m not sure why we are supposed to do that. It’s a grade school thing that I don’t really feel the need to do. I’m an American, for Pete’s sake. Why do I have to pledge my allegiance?

Anyway, it was an awkward start to a rally that grew increasingly uncomfortable. First was Carly Fiorina. She is actually a very good speaker, if you ignore her content. She is very much the “attack dog” for Cruz. I won’t make any judgments about why he chose a running mate when he is obviously losing this nomination race. Wait, I think I will! Seriously, what the fuck, man? You don’t choose a running mate until you’re the actual nominee! As the media is saying, it is very much an act of desperation.

Then it was the main attraction, if you can call Ted Cruz an “attraction.” It was basically the stump speech I’ve seen him giving as I’ve watched coverage of these primaries. Some of the same lame jokes and one-liners that I’ve already heard. Hillary’s going to jail, the Washington establishment, blah blah blah. The crowd didn’t seem that into it at first, but as the rally went on, people started getting a little more agitated. Some of the biggest applause lines were that he would “repeal Obamacare” (can’t do that on your own, man) and that on Day One, he would “tear up” the Iran nuclear deal (can’t do that, either). Probably the biggest “boo-getter” was a mention of Planned Parenthood. That just made me sad.

Cassie stuck around and got her picture with Cruz and Fiorina—she told Cruz that she likes Planned Parenthood...way to go, Cassie!—but I really needed to get out of there. It’s hard to describe what I was feeling by the end of this rally. I felt very alone, but was happy to be sitting next to Cassie for the moral support. I felt a bit of despair that so many people were eating all this up. And oh, the irony of Carly Fiorina talking about losing jobs to Mexico! She said, “I know where the jobs are going.” Yeah, so do those 30,000 people you laid off! The hatred for the Affordable Care Act, the hatred for Planned Parenthood, the hatred for Hillary Clinton...it was just a big fat Hate Fest. I felt like a Stranger in a Strange Land, and I definitely did NOT grok this.

I’m glad I went but it was a little damaging to my psyche. I’ll bounce back! I guess I’d better, because I got tickets to go see the Vulgar Talking Yam (hat tip to Charlie Pierce) himself on Monday. I feel reassured that Ken is planning on going with me. A while after I got those tickets, I found out that Bernie Sanders is also going to stop here, on Sunday. I just can’t do it, though. I need my quiet Sunday and I will spend the afternoon girding my loins for Monday. I honestly don’t know if we’ll be able to get in and I am not standing in line for hours.

We have a backup plan, though. Food and beers at Brew Werks! Victory with a capital V!

Gesundheit!

I’m not a big fan of appointments. I seem to have this deep-seated resentment at being told what to do and when to do it. I’m a rebel, Dottie.

I slacked off a little bit last year in my preventive healthcare, but I’m back on board this year. I kind of like to get it all done in one fell swoop, so I’ve had three appointments this week, I have to drop off a specimen tomorrow, and I have a follow-up appointment on Monday. Ugh! I’m not having much fun with all of this, but I feel good about being proactive when it comes to my health. (The title of this entry means “Health!” in German. It’s what I always say when someone sneezes.)

It’s easy to forget that not everyone has access to preventive care. I was heartened to read recently that the number of uninsured in the U.S. continues to drop. Thanks, Obama! Really, I mean it. Thank you for caring enough about all Americans to get the Affordable Care Act passed. It is making a difference in people’s lives, and it was a wonderful step forward for our country. We should all keep working to make it better and get even more people insured!

I get my teeth cleaned twice a year. I get screened for various cancers and conditions. I get booster shots and additional immunizations as I need them. I get my eyes checked every couple of years, and I get new glasses a little less frequently. Every American deserves to have such screenings, and deserves medical care, without facing bankruptcy.

I am grateful to have had good health insurance throughout my life, and I want that for my fellow citizens. Who wouldn’t?

Asskicking redux

I had my last appointment of my October Healthcare Tour today, and what a relief to be done with all of those! This one was just a cleaning at the dentist, so it was an easy one, too. I got a good check-up from the wonderful Dr. Herbster. He told me I didn’t have a lot of plaque build-up and said, “Good job!” Yay! I can’t help it...I like getting praise from my healthcare professionals. It means I’m doing something right!

As he scraped away, he chatted with me. (We went to high school together, so we have that little bond.) He said, “Hey, I got my flu shot!” He changed instruments then, so I was able to say, “Me too!” He went on to say that he went twenty years without getting a flu shot, but last year, he got nailed with the flu, and so did his wife—at the same time. He said he’s never been so miserable in his life, and he understands now why people are hospitalized with influenza and even die from it. He changed instruments again, and I said, “Exactly! That’s what I keep trying to tell people...it really can be a killer!” He agreed and said that he wasn’t taking that chance again, so he got his shot as soon as he could this year. He also said that when him and his wife were sick, his folks wanted to come over and help them, but he told them that the best thing they could do was stay away. He didn’t want them to get it. He’s exactly right. Some people are more susceptible to complications from it, and that includes the elderly.

PLEASE don’t ignore the flu shot. Influenza might not kill you if you’re very healthy, but it will definitely make you feel like shit for a good couple of weeks. And who wants to feel like shit for that long? Not me!

Speaking of healthcare, some of you may recall that I wrote a blog entry back in April titled “This needs an asskicking.” It was a response to one of those things that makes its way around the Interwebz via email and social media posts. It was about some creepy guy confronting a group of young people in a restaurant about the Affordable Care Act and schooling them about what it means to be free. The email being passed around was one of the dumbest of its type that I’ve ever read, and I had a little fun skewering it. (It really was a fun one to write!)

Well, I’ve been noticing that that entry was getting a lot of hits. Not up in the thousands or anything like that, but I’ve been getting multiple hits per day from all over the country, mainly on that entry. I was wondering what was going on, and I was finally able to track down the source, at least somewhat. Some of the visits seem to be just from people doing a search for that particular email letter. Since I copy the whole thing in my entry, it’s understandable that a search for it would give that entry as one of the results. Although I honestly do not know how anyone other than my small group of readers came across it, I found a couple of places where someone had posted it. Both were discussions of that email thing, and someone posted the link to my entry in both forums.

One was an IMDb forum. I have no idea why that was being discussed on an IMDb forum. I use IMDb occasionally to look up stuff about movies, but I don’t participate in any discussion forums, so that was weird.

Even weirder was that one of the discussions was on a Florida Sportsman forum.


I know, right? I was like, “How the heck did my blog entry end up on Florida Sportsman??” There was some back and forth discussion on the Affordable Care Act, from both supporters and haters. Someone there posted the original email letter thing, and one of the guys on the forum responded, “And an equally amusing response” and provided the link to my entry. I don’t know how he came across it, but it apparently amused him enough to post the link in a discussion forum! I'm glad you enjoyed it, Gary!

You know how we always say, “Of course, the people who need to read this never will”? Perhaps this time that didn’t hold true. At least one person said that they couldn’t get past the first paragraph or so because it was a typical liberal response, blah blah blah. But maybe one or two read it and it planted a little kernel of doubt in their minds about their hysterical response to a law designed to insure more people. Truthfully, I kind of doubt it. It still makes me happy that they saw it, though, and maybe got an eyeful of just how ridiculous those circulated things appear to some of us.

Takin’ Care of Business

Whoops, a few days without an entry here, but I’m not going to feel too bad about it, because it’s been a bit of a busy week for me. I’m looking forward to a day at home on Friday!

I’ve had three medical appointments in the past three days, and I have one more to go on Monday (the dentist). Good news on all fronts so far, with a negative mammogram, healthy eyes with no significant change from last year, and a good checkup with my doctor today. She is such a gem, and we even had a few laughs today. As we were finishing up, she said, “You’re doing great, and I’m happy that I don’t have to yell at you about anything!” I laughed and said, “And I’m happy to not be yelled at!”

I got my flu shot today, too. I have a slightly sore shoulder, but nothing major, and I’m always happy to get my flu shot taken care of. Happy to do it this early in the season, too! Everyone go get your flu shot, okay?

I’ve also had to make sure I was at home a couple of these afternoons, for a DirecTV technician (all fixed!) and a wine shipment (all delivered!). This is much more activity than I normally deal with, so I am ready for a down day!

I’ve been watching the shenanigans in Washington. And by ‘shenanigans,’ I mean the complete and utter batshittery of the Republican party right now. I’m not going to go into it at all here. I’m sure you’re all paying attention, and I’m also sure that you all know what I think about this bullshit and how disgusted I am.

What really astounds me is that all of this is because they want to keep millions of people from getting health insurance. I’ve been thinking about that a lot this week as I’ve gone to my various appointments to obtain preventive care. I’ve been fortunate in having employer-subsidized health insurance for my entire career. Since I worked in healthcare, it was always very good insurance, too. There were times when I paid maybe $10 a month for insurance. I usually had a copay, but that is still some pretty great insurance.

The reason I supported the Affordable Care Act from the beginning is because I want everyone to have that. I want everyone to have access to preventive care. I want everyone to get checkups and screenings and have a doctor that they can turn to when they have a medical problem. I don’t want anyone to be wiped out by medical bills, or have to declare bankruptcy because they get cancer or have a heart attack or a stroke, or whatever.

So while I watched the teabagger faction of the Republican party completely lose their shit this week, I also watched with joy as the exchanges opened on Tuesday and people began signing up. There are definitely problems with access, and some of that seems to be both volume and software. I am confident that these issues will be fixed soon. I have plenty of friends and family who may qualify for the exchanges and for subsidies, and my fingers are crossed for them.

As for the Republicans whose goal is to stop the Affordable Care Act, in the words of Austin Powers, that train has sailed.

Just The Man keeping 'em down

A big story in a rather quiet news week was that a conservative group called FreedomWorks is encouraging young people to not sign up for the Affordable Care Act’s health exchanges. Their reasoning seems to be that the exchanges really will work because young, healthy people will sign up, bringing the cost down for everyone and allowing more people to be able to get health insurance. So they’re encouraging them to not sign up and pay the penalty. Ha! Ha! Wouldn’t it be funny if a bunch of young adults did that? They wouldn’t have any health insurance at all! That’s...just...so...

Hilarious.

Way to stick it to The Man, kids!

::sigh::

Except the thing is, they’re not just sticking it to The Man. They’re sticking it to themselves. As Jonathan Cohn’s brief article states, you don’t just get to sign up for insurance when you get sick; there are open enrollment periods (just like in every other employer-based health plan in which I’ve participated), and if you happen to get seriously ill or hit by a car or bitten by a monitor lizard, or any of a number of bad things that can happen out there in the great big scary world, and it happens to be in a non-enrollment period, you’re shit outta luck, my friend. You will be stuck with one mofo of a hospital bill, and although most places will try to work with you, they WILL come after you and try to get you to pay. You think your college loans are bad? Try dealing with a hospital bill with three or four—or even five—zeroes after a 6 or an 8 or whatever.

It’s bad enough that there are people out there who are trying to convince young adults to go against their best interests. I mean, seriously...who doesn’t want the security of health insurance? When I was a young adult, I had the usual false feelings of invincibility that most young adults do; I felt like I had my whole life ahead of me and nothing really bad could happen to me. Even so, I never even considered going without health insurance. My husband at the time was in the military, so I got everything free of charge there. (Can you believe that damn government giving me free health care like that?!) When we divorced, I immediately got on the plan offered by the hospital where I was working.

The thought of being without health insurance terrifies me. I saw firsthand over the course of my career how high medical costs are, and how a normally healthy person can be devastated by an unexpected illness. Heart attack, stroke, disseminated intravascular coagulation, a broken leg that throws a clot to your lungs and causes a pulmonary embolism, a disseminated fungal infection in a guy that went out hunting...the list is endless! I don’t live my life in a state of paranoia, but I DO understand that all these things can happen, and often do. Why on earth would anyone be foolish enough to not accept reasonably priced health insurance if it were made available to them?

So it’s bad enough that these FreedomWorks yahoos are encouraging young adults to do just that. What is even more horrible to me is that there are kids that are actually falling for it. I honestly don’t know what they’re thinking, except...well, they probably aren’t thinking. They’re not reasoning it through. They are letting themselves be duped by these special interest groups who are operating on a political agenda. Groups who think that it is a bad thing to have more Americans having the security of health insurance. What kind of a heartless bastard actually thinks that? I’d really like to know.

To those kids who are burning their bogus “Obamacare draft cards”: You aren’t sticking it to The Man.

The Lobbyist Man is sticking it to you.

Reprehensible

I read an article today from Wonkblog titled “Inside the Obamacare resistance.” It tells of the various right wing and teabagger groups that are encouraging young people to not sign up for the healthcare exchanges.

Let me write that again: they are encouraging young people to not sign up for the healthcare exchanges.

In an effort to make it seem like a real protest, they are channeling Vietnam war protesters by printing up bogus “Obamacare” cards that look like draft cards and telling kids to burn them.

I cannot even begin to tell you how disgusting I find this. First of all, they are equating the healthcare exchanges with a war-time draft. These are completely different things, and trying to conflate the two is nothing more than ridiculous rhetoric and circus-style showmanship.

Second, they are getting some of these kids (apparently some real dumbass kids, but even dumbass kids deserve healthcare) to go against their best interests. Shouldn’t the goal be to get everyone to have access to affordable healthcare? Instead, these punkass window lickers are encouraging kids to go against something that will be beneficial to their health, wellbeing, and financial prospects. I think most of us know someone personally or through others who has had to declare bankruptcy because of medical bills. No one deserves that, and these groups are encouraging kids to take that risk! Assholes!

One has to wonder why they hate the Affordable Care Act so much. The only answer I can come up with is that it is because A) they have a complete lack of understanding of what it will and will not do or 2) they hate President Obama and want to see him fail in every possible way. Probably a combination of both.

Whether it’s Congress pursuing policies that don’t work (ask Europe how austerity economics is working for them) or purposefully not acting on bills designed to nudge the economy in the right direction, or these dickweeds telling kids to not sign up for affordable health insurance, I’ve just about had it with the whole damn lot of them.

[throwing a metaphorical chair across the room]

This needs an asskicking

And I’m in the mood to do it. This has been making the rounds on the Interwebz lately, and I’ve seen it posted in several places. Thank goodness no one has sent it to me in an email; I think lessons have been learned! I could barely read it, and had to skim over it in parts to keep my head from exploding. First of all, I hate these sort of “morality plays” that get passed around. They’re inevitably trite and contrived, and this one is particularly so. It could also possibly be one of the dumbest things I’ve ever read, and I feel the need for a rebuttal, if only to cleanse my brain of this nonsense. So settle back, kids. This is going to be a long one. My commentary in red, which should be obvious.

***

I was in my neighborhood restaurant this morning and was seated behind a group of jubilant individuals celebrating the coming implementation of the health care bill. I could not finish my breakfast. This is what ensued: They were a diverse group of several races and both sexes.

I find it odd that it seems necessary to point out that “several races and both sexes” were in this group. Why not just say it was a bunch of blahs and beaners and bitches and let your freak racist/misogynist flag fly? Get it right there out front. Go on. You’ll feel better. Sorry they made you feel barfy, though.

I heard a young man exclaim, “Isn’t Obama like Jesus Christ? I mean, after all, he is healing the sick.”

Is this how conservatives think liberals talk? I have a lot of liberal friends, and I have never had a single one of them compare President Obama to Jesus Christ, or say that Obama is “healing the sick.” I hardly think that expanding health care so that it is more accessible to all Americans qualifies as “healing the sick.” And before you start bandying JC’s name about, you might want to take another look at what the bible says that he said about it. Start with this one.

A young woman enthusiastically proclaimed, “Yeah, and he does it for free. I cannot believe anyone would think that a free market wouldn't work for health care.”

I’m not really sure what is going on here. No, it’s not free. We are all paying for it with our taxes, just like we pay for our roads, defense, and other essential services provided by the government. We on the left understand this, and we approve of it. Because, you see, we believe that everyone should have the right to at least basic, preventive healthcare. I also don’t understand the “free market” comment. Is this fictional liberal using the word “free” as in no one has to pay for it, or “free market” in the economic sense? Healthcare insurance isn’t a free market system; the prices of payment are set by the insurance companies. The Affordable Care Act does not open up a totally free market for healthcare. It expands coverage to more people and it sets some boundaries for insurance companies. This is where the whole thing really started becoming nonsensical to me.

Another said, "The stupid Republicans want us all to starve to death so they can inherit all of the power. Obama should be made a Saint for what he did for those of us less fortunate.”

I don’t think the Republicans want all liberals to starve to death. Only the poors and the blahs and the sluts and the ones who vote. I kid, I kid. But what does “starving to death” have to do with the Affordable Care Act? Again, not making much sense here. And Obama should achieve sainthood? Nah. But I think he is to be commended for caring about the 47%, unlike SOME people (nottomentionanynamesmittromney). It is a little noble to think that people shouldn’t have to die of preventable diseases, or should be able to get treatment if they can’t afford it, or shouldn’t have to lose their home because of medical bills. Caring about those less fortunate...that’s quite a concept. Some might say it’s almost...Christlike.

At this, I had more than enough. I arose from my seat, mustering all the restraint I could find, and approached their table. “Please excuse me; may I impose upon you for one moment?” They smiled and welcomed me to the conversation. I stood at the end of their table, smiled as best I could and began an experiment.

No, real restraint would mean minding your own damn business and not horning in on their conversation. And this is not really what constitutes an “experiment.”  But you’ve already made your move. Please proceed, governor.

“I would like to give one of you my house. It will cost you no money and I will pay all of the expenses and taxes for as long as you live there. Anyone interested?”

They looked at each other in astonishment. “Why would you do something like that?” asked a young man, “There isn’t anything for free in this world.”

They began to laugh at me, as they did not realize this man had just made my point.

Ha! Ha! Ha! Stoopid liberals. You’re about to get schooled. Let me reiterate: we understand this is not free. We understand that our taxes are paying for it, and we’re okay with that. We also think it’s reasonable to ask those with the most to pay a little bit more than those with the least.

“I am serious, I will give you my house for free, no money whatsoever. Anyone interested?”

In unison, a resounding “Yeah” fills the room.

HUZZAH! And please watch your tense. You’re waffling between past and present tense here.

“Since there are too many of you, I will have to make a choice as to who receives this money-free bargain.”

Guys, I think this dude is kinda starting to creep me out. It’s like he’s getting his rocks off playing god and thinking he’s all wise and shit.

I noticed an elderly couple was paying attention to the spectacle unfolding before their eyes, the old man shaking his head in apparent disgust.

Maybe he’s disgusted with YOU, did you ever stop to think about that? Maybe he thinks you’re a creep and you need to stop harassing these people.

“I tell you what; I will give it to the one of you most willing to obey my rules.”

Again, they looked at one another, an expression of bewilderment on their faces.

Clever dude. You’ve got ‘em bewildered. Of course, that’s pretty easy to do with us liberals, amirite? Also, I don’t like your semicolon use. A plain old period would have sufficed. A colon might have been more stylish. But a semicolon? No.

The perky young woman asked, “What are the rules?”

Perky? Young? That’s it. This guy’s a creeper. He’s looking at your tits, honey. Get away from him!

I smiled and said, “I don’t know. I have not yet defined them. However, it is a free home that I offer you.”

They giggled amongst themselves, the youngest of which said, “What an old coot. He must be crazy to give away his home. Go take your meds, old man.”

Teeheehee, giggly liberals. You so silly! And “It is a free home that I offer you.” Who talks like that? “I will now play for you the song of my people.”

I smiled and leaned into the table a bit further. “I am serious, this is a legitimate offer.”

Yeah, he’s trying to look down your shirt, honey. Lean back. There you go. Seriously, this guy needs to go back to his own table.

They gaped at me for a moment.

“I’ll take it you old fool. Where are the keys?” boasted the youngest among them.

Isn’t it amazing how stupid liberals are? Look at them just sitting there with their mouths open. And how is what the youngest said a “boast?” In order to boast, one has to tout one’s own accomplishments or prowess. None of that in his remarks. Wow, this is really crappy writing.

“Then I presume you accept ALL of my terms then?” I asked.

You used “then” twice. Yep. Really crappy writing.

The elderly couple seemed amused and entertained as they watched from the privacy of their table. “Oh yeah! Where do I sign up?”

Maybe they’re not amused and entertained. Maybe they’re afraid that you’re going to pull out a gun and go all Honey Bunny on the place. But no, you’re beyond that now. You’re in full kindly old uncle mode, ready to teach these whippersnappers a thing or two. More like kindly old uncle who stares too hard at you when you’re getting out of the pool, and who hugs you just a little too long and too close, if you ask me.

I took a napkin and wrote, “I give this man my home, without the burden of financial obligation, so long as he accepts and abides by the terms that I shall set forth upon consummation of this transaction.” I signed it and handed it to the young man who eagerly scratched out his signature.

“Where are the keys to my new house?” he asked in a mocking tone of voice.

Sigh. Way too adverby and adjectivy. You should really consider taking a class. It could help. Also...must be a big napkin. Hope it’s a paper one, otherwise you are defacing the restaurant’s property.

All eyes were upon us as I stepped back from the table, pulling the keys from pocket and dangling them before the excited new homeowner.

“From pocket.” Please register for a class now. And the drama is killing me. *gasp* What’s he going to do? What will he say? [biting nails]

“Now that we have entered into this binding contract, witnessed by all of your friends, I have decided upon the conditions you are obligated to adhere to from this point forward. You may only live in the house for one hour a day. You will not use anything inside of the home. You will obey me without question or resistance. I expect complete loyalty and admiration for this gift I bestow upon you. You will accept my commands and wishes with enthusiasm, no matter the nature. Your morals and principles shall be as mine. You will vote as I do, think as I do and do it with blind faith. These are my terms. Here are your keys.”

I reached the keys forward and the young man looked at me dumbfounded.

“Are you out of your mind? Who would ever agree to those ridiculous terms?” the young man appeared irritated.

“You did when you signed this contract before reading it, understanding it and with the full knowledge that I would provide my conditions only after you committed to the agreement.”

Oooo, the big reveal! Are you amazed, stupid liberals? Wow, this dude really got the better of you, didn’t he? Burrrrrn! But seriously, guys, he is really creeping me out here. “You will accept my commands and wishes with enthusiasm” is something you hear right before you’re chloroformed and wake up naked and chained to a wall, a ball gag in your mouth. Not that that’s ever happened to me or anything.
 
The elderly man chuckled as his wife tried to restrain him. I was looking at a now silenced and bewildered group of people.

Wait, he’s chuckling as his wife is trying to restrain him? This is getting weird. Maybe he’s going to try to take you out before you kill a whole restaurant full of people.

“You can shove that stupid deal up your a** old man. I want no part of it!” exclaimed the now infuriated young man.

Language, language! Man, kids these days.

'You have committed to the contract, as witnessed by all of your friends. You cannot get out of the deal unless I agree to it. I do not intend to let you free now that I have you ensnared. I am the power you agreed to. I am the one you blindly and without thought chose to enslave yourself to. In short, I am your Master.”

Good lord! Run, you guys, RUN! He’s gonna break out the chloroform any minute now! This is gonna be you, I’m not kidding! You just know this guy’s got a gimp of his own chained up back at his place!

At this, the table of celebrating individuals became a unified group against the unfairness of the deal.

After a few moments of unrepeatable comments and slurs, I revealed my true intent.

No, I think they all finally figured out that you’re a seriously creepy dude and they’re telling you to fuck off.

“What I did to you is what this administration and congress did to you with the health care legislation. I easily suckered you in and then revealed the real cost of the bargain. Your folly was in the belief that you can have something you did not earn, and for that which you did not earn, you willingly allowed someone else to think for you. Your failure to research, study and inform yourself permitted reason to escape you. You have entered into a trap from which you cannot flee. Your only chance of freedom is if your new Master gives it to you. A freedom that is given can also be taken away. Therefore, it is not freedom at all.”

Except that many of us on the left DID do our research, and spent plenty of time finding out what was and wasn’t in the bill. And then we supported it, and many of us contacted our legislators to urge them to vote for it. Are we entirely happy with it? No. We feel that single payer healthcare would have been the way to go, and would have liked to see Medicare expansion to everyone. But it’s a start, something to be improved upon, and it will allow tens of millions of Americans to get healthcare. That’s a good thing, because I think every person deserves to be treated as a human being, and that includes a right to basic healthcare. But hey, what do I know? I’m just one of those stoopid liberals.

With that, I tore up the napkin and placed it before the astonished young man. “This is the nature of your new health care legislation.”

No, it’s really not. The only thing that comes even close to being true about this is that there is a mandate that everyone has insurance. Because at some point, you’re going to need to be cared for, whether you get food poisoning, get hit by a bus, or fall off a ladder while you’re cleaning your gutters. These sorts of things happen to people all the time, no matter how careful you are, and when you go to the Emergency Room, guess who pays for it if you don’t have insurance? Those of us who DO have insurance, because our premiums go up because you’re too goddamn stubborn to realize that having health insurance is a good thing--for everyone. Or maybe you’re too deluded by your fears of a central government. Which we’ve had for quite a few years now, if you hadn’t noticed. Maybe you slept through that part of history class that discussed the whole war in which states’ rights versus federal rights was in question. (Hint: latter trumps the former. It’s in the Constitution. Look it up.)

I turned away to leave these few in thought and contemplation -- and was surprised by applause.

Everyone is relieved that the hostage situation is over, and was resolved without bloodshed.

The elderly gentleman, who was clearly entertained, shook my hand enthusiastically and said, “Thank you, Sir. These kids don’t understand Liberty .”

Liberty with a capital L! That’s what I’m talkin’ about! That’s right. They don’t understand the liberty of finding out you have cancer and having months of treatment and reaching the cap on your insurance and having to declare bankruptcy and sell your house because of medical bills. They don’t understand how utterly and completely FREE you feel when you notice a lump in your breast but don’t have the money to see a doctor, so you just let it go. They don’t understand what it’s like to have out-of-control diabetes and watch as your toe turns black and starts to smell kind of bad, and to realize that you just can’t see as well as you used to and that your vision might be failing. They don’t understand the sheer joy that happens when your child is running a fever and you have to sit in the waiting room of the ER for eight hours before you can see a doctor, and you miss an entire day of work because of it and wonder if you’re going to get fired as a result. DO YOU LOVE YER FREEDOMS??

He refused to allow me to pay my bill as he said, “You earned this one. It is an honor to pick up the tab.”

I shook his hand in thanks, leaving the restaurant somewhat humbled and sensing a glimmer of hope for my beloved country.

I see. So this rat bastard creepster gets a free lunch out of the deal and thinks it’s just dandy. But for fuck’s sake, let’s not even consider the idea of helping those who are less fortunate, or aiding the poor and disadvantaged. Because that would be silly and downright un-American.

1. Remember... Four boxes keep us free: the soap box, the ballot box, the jury box, and the cartridge box.

2. THIS SHOULD GO AROUND THE UNITED STATES SO PEOPLE CAN SEE JUST WHAT IS GOING ON. MAYBE EVEN THE POLITICALLY BLIND ONES WILL LEARN SOMETHING FROM IT.

***

Beth here again, back in black. I’m always happy to climb up on my soap box, and I had a lot of fun writing this today. I also enjoy casting my vote, and I will happily do jury duty if called. I’m not so sure about the cartridge box. I support responsible gun ownership, but I think I’d still feel pretty free if I didn’t have a gun. I guess I just don’t subscribe to the paranoid idea that the government is going to declare martial law and haul me off to the gulag. I also realize that my .38 Ladysmith isn’t going to defend against an Apache helicopter. I try to stay focused on reality, you know?

I know exactly what is going on. I know that President Obama was able to do something that presidents have been trying to do for decades: pass a comprehensive healthcare bill that will provide basic medical care to millions of Americans. That is something that gives me a glimmer of hope for my country. I am also not politically blind. Far from it.

But I did learn something from this piece. It confirmed my commitment to being a proud liberal, and to working and contributing to help get progressives into office. I learned that many conservatives think we are stupid, clueless hippies who are not paying attention. Feel free to keep on thinking that. I also learned--or confirmed--that there are profound differences between us and the right. It boils down to embracing a strong central government or rejecting it. I truly believe that a strong central government can and does do good things. One of the things they can do well is a national healthcare system. Medicare has its inefficiencies and problems, but overall, it delivers care at a much lower price. But I’m not going to rehash that debate; I’ve said my piece on it previously, several times.

The Affordable Care Act is the law of the land. Stop trying to repeal it, stop posting idiocy like this, and if you feel it can be made better, come up with some ideas and write to your legislators. Many more people will be covered under the ACA, and lives will be saved. That’s a good thing. The persistence of this notion that all liberals are clueless children who want free stuff is not doing you any favors, and it is part of what cost you the last election. I shouldn’t have to point this out to you.

**mic drop**