In every dream home a heartache
And every step I take
Takes me further from heaven
Is there a heaven?
"In Every Dream Home a Heartache" by Roxy Music
It's been well over two years since I've written here. I've been through some shit during that time. Some of you who know me know exactly what shit I'm talking about. I don't care to elaborate here at the moment. Suffice it to say that it's been a difficult time.
However, I've learned that as tough as I've always thought I was, I was even tougher than that. And as always, music saved me.
I was sitting at the computer one night, feeling a little aimless, going through the motions of my regular life, one that had changed so rapidly a few months before. I was watching a video of something and when it ended, a suggestion popped up for me.
It was "Mother of Pearl" by Roxy Music.
Of course, I knew about Roxy Music. Anyone who truly loves rock and roll does. I still have my 45 of "Love is the Drug," a song I loved back then and still love. But I had never gotten into them the way I had other bands. When you grow up in a small Midwestern town, you don't get a lot of exposure to certain bands, and Roxy was much more popular in Europe than they were in the States.
So I watched the video and was utterly mesmerized. I watched it again. And again, growing more enchanted with every viewing. 'Enchanted' is the correct word, too. I felt as though I'd had a spell cast over me. I remember thinking, "Jesus Christ, where have you been all my life?!"
And thus was born an obsession.
Many of you know what a Fangirl I can be, and when I Fangirl, I Fangirl all the way. I immediately began to do research. That's really what it was, too, because I wanted to learn everything I could about this amazing band that had escaped me for far too many years. I bought CDs, vinyl, DVDs of performances, special editions, and books. I've read four of them and have about that many more to read. As I work on putting up different artwork in the house, I ordered a bunch of prints of frontman Bryan Ferry, because there's no denying that he is one of the most iconic figures in rock history. (Kind of nice to look at, too.)
It has become a months-long passion that has given me focus and joy. I was reasonably certain that I hadn't lost those things, but they were buried under some pretty major emotional upheaval, and Roxy unearthed them. It felt so good to find that passion again and it's no surprise that it was music! It was a surprise that it was a band whose first release was in 1972, but ours is not to reason why. Just hand over the passion and nobody gets hurt, okay, pal?
If I can keep up some writing on here, I'll have more to write about individual songs (including the one that sparked the fire), but for now, I'll write briefly about the band itself and how influential they are.
They're widely considered to be a glam rock band, but they really aren't that at all. I think they got labeled with that because of their early, flashy stage looks: feathers, sequins, platform shoes, makeup. They were absolutely visually stunning, there is no doubt about that, but on their own terms, with no conforming wardrobe rules. (See: Bryan Ferry's iconic tuxedo jacket.) They're also considered to be one of the precursors of punk, but as I took a deep dive into them, I didn't hear that in much of their music.
What was definitely punk about them is that they embodied the punk ethos of DIY. Guys who weren't technically great musicians (except for Andy Mackay, the oboe/sax player, who studied music) but decided to learn on the job. Bryan Ferry taught himself to play the piano (just like me!) and had the novel idea of blending his art school training with music: making music as a work of art, a sort of performance art. It's no surprise that one of their biggest influences was The Velvet Underground.
Ferry studied under the pop artist Richard Hamilton at the University of Newcastle, and when I looked up Hamilton, I found that many of his works were modernist collages: a way of looking at pop culture and consumerism, the conveniences of modern life but also the emptiness and vapidity. As I dived deep into Roxy's songs, I found that many of them are collages themselves, combining different types of music, different tempos, different feelings altogether. It's been fascinating to me to think about the art/music connection. Roxy itself was a bit of a collage: from the early days of surreal and wonky experimentation to the middle days of more straight-up rock to the final smooth and timeless pop songs. You can break it down to the "For Your Pleasure" era, the "Siren" era, and the "Avalon" era. All very different sounds, but the same core players (Ferry, Mackay, guitarist Phil Manzanera).
Roxy's influence on other bands is beyond extensive. Steve Jones of the Sex Pistols named his first band The Strand, after a Roxy song; Souixsie and The Banshees are named after one of Bryan Ferry's college bands, The Banshees; Bananarama got their name from the Roxy song "Pyjamarama"; they are one of Duran Duran's biggest influences; one of Roxy's songs, written by Ferry, is "2HB," an homage to Humphrey Bogart, and Madness recorded a song called "4BF," an homage to Bryan Ferry; Cousin Shane's current band obsession, The Killers, has said that Roxy is one of their biggest influences.
To say that Bryan Ferry and Roxy Music changed the face of music is no exaggeration. They were resented by many musicians and music journalists at the time because they seemed to explode on the scene so quickly. It had been widely accepted that the proper protocol was for bands to "pay their dues" by touring extensively for years, playing small clubs and colleges. Roxy upended all of that, saying, "No, we want a record contract right away," and amazingly, through doggedness and sheer ballsiness, they got it. Their debut album, self-titled, went to #10 on the British charts, which was astounding for a band that had only recently started out.
Their presence and innovation was influential then and is just as influential now. And here I am, 50 years later, their music saving me from an ongoing dark night of the soul. While there is still a heartache in my dream home, Roxy and Bryan Ferry eased that heartache considerably, pushing it aside with passion and joy at the "discovery" of this truly amazing band.
Viva Roxy Music!