The Return of the Grifter

Because I’m a glutton for punishment, I’ve been watching a little coverage of CPAC, the conservative conference going on right now in Maryland. I can’t watch much of it—one can only handle so much negativity and lunacy—but I watched Sarah Palin’s speech earlier today.

You haven’t seen me write much about ol’ Scarah lately, and that has been for a couple of reasons. First of all, I don’t like wasting blog space on her or giving her any attention whatsoever. (That is why I’m not including a picture of her here, even a funny one. So here’s a moose instead.) Secondly, there really hasn’t been much to write about. She has pretty much faded from the scene, even losing her job on ClusterFox. The biggest news about her lately is that “she” is “writing” another book, this one about the nonexistent “war on Christmas.”

But she got invited to CPAC, so I watched and took notes.

The specifics really don’t matter, because there were none. There was the usual stuff about Obama taking our guns away, the cornpone delivery with lots of “ain’ts” thrown in, the hockey mom jokes (is Piper playing hockey now?), gimmicks like pulling a Big Gulp out from under the podium, taking a swig, and making fun of Mayor Bloomberg, a stale TelePrompTer joke, a delivery that almost sounded like baby talk, and of course, plenty of Obama-bashing. She told a joke about Todd getting her a gun rack and him getting a gun: “He got the rifle, I got the rack!” Gross! What woman who wants to be taken seriously tells a joke like that? “Washington has become a reality show,” said the woman who had her own reality show and a daughter who appeared on a reality show and then had HER own reality show. She ridiculed green energy and mentioned the bogus “Obamaphone” claim. At one point, she channeled Joe Wilson and said, “Barack Obama, you lie!” At another point, she compared President Obama to Bernie Madoff.

In other words, she was tossing out chunks of bloody meat to the crowd, and the poor saps were just eating it up. It was pretty disgusting, and I was reminded all over again why I despise Palin. However, I take consolation in knowing that she really is essentially irrelevant now. Idiots will keep contributing to her PAC, and she’ll spend a fraction of it on actual candidates and the rest on “expenditures.” But her time as a political contender has passed. As Ken said, she’ll never run for national office again, because she’s just not smart enough. I’ll add that she also doesn’t want to work that hard. I’ll give credit where credit is due: she knows how to work a crowd. But so do pro wrestlers, and she has about as much legitimacy.

I’m sure that plenty of her supporters will continue to clamor for her to “Run, Sarah, run!” Personally, I would love it if she did. Not only would it be an endless source of amusement, but if by some bizarre chance she ever got the nomination, it would guarantee a Democrat victory. (I actually had someone ask me, “Why do so many liberals want her to run? She’s obviously a conservative.” Yeah...not the sharpest tool in the shed there, are ya, Skippy?) I find it a little sad, though, that so many people continue to love and support her and want her to run...and she just sits back and rakes in their money. She’s never going to run, you sad, sad people. But she’ll be happy to continue taking your cash.

So that was the brief return of the Governor. I suspect we won’t hear much from her going forward, other than a book tour for “her” book. You won’t read anything about her here again, either, unless she generates some genuine news.

Senator McCain, this is your legacy. You will be remembered for several things, some good, some bad, but one of the main things will be that you were the one who foisted this vapid, vindictive, greedy grifter upon the country, and put her within a stone’s throw of the Presidency. It is to our great fortune that you did not succeed, and it will be to your lasting shame that you even tried.

Beth’s Music Moment: Sympathy for the Devil

I’ve been very busy lately with getting our Route 66 photo book done, and I’m finally on the last steps: proofreading and uploading. I’ve missed writing here on this little blog o’ mine!

I’ve also been paying close attention to what is going on with the Rolling Stones. I’ve heard from those who keep their ears to the ground that after their five 50th anniversary shows, they would be doing a U.S. and European tour, and sure enough, it was reported by Rolling Stone a couple of days ago that they will be doing 18 shows in the U.S., and Glastonbury in the U.K. Ken and I will be going, no matter where we have to go!

So I’ve been on a bit of a Stones kick lately, listening to the remastered “Some Girls” and their latest greatest hits compilation, “GRRR!” One of the songs on the latter is my favorite Rolling Stones song, and it is, in fact, my favorite song of all time! (Feel free to insert echo there.) I could have sworn that I’ve written about this song before, but I couldn’t find it, so forgive me if I am repeating myself.

“Sympathy for the Devil” is THE perfect song, in my opinion. It begins with just percussion, a beat that makes you start to move a little bit. Then we get to the lyrics, sung in Mick’s tasty baritone:

Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and fate

I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moments of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

I stuck around St. Petersburg
When I saw it was a time for a change
Killed the Czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain

I rode a tank
Held a General's rank
When the Blitzkrieg raged
And the bodies stank

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
What's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah

I watched the glee
While your kings and queens
Fought for ten decades
For the Gods they made

I shouted out
"Who killed the Kennedys?"
Well after all
It was you and me

Let me please introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for troubadours
Who get killed before they reached Bombay

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah

Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails just call me Lucifer
I'm in need of some restraint

So if you meet me, have some courtesy
Have some sympathy and some taste
Use all your well learned politics
Or I'll lay your soul to waste, mmm yeah

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, mmm yeah
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, get down
Woo hoo, ah yeah, get on down, oh yeah

Tell me, baby, what's my name?
Tell me, honey, baby guess my name
Tell me, baby, what's my name?
I'll tell ya one time you're to blame

I remember that in my youth, this song was condemned as being “satanic” and “glorifying the devil.” I guess it’s an easy mistake to make, considering the title. But if you spend any time listening to the song and paying attention to the lyrics, you’ll find that it is not sympathetic whatsoever. It is, in fact, a condemnation of our own actions. “I shouted out who killed the Kennedys, when after all, it was you and me.” The song builds slowly, with the instruments gradually joining in, and then the background vocals kick in. It is one of the most insidious, subtle songs I’ve ever heard, and it is perfection. A few minutes in, if you’re not dancing, you’re dead.

The cleverness of the lyrics, mentioning Jesus Christ and Pilate, the Bolshevik revolution, the evil of the Third Reich, the assassination of JFK and RFK. The mention of the kings and queens and the “gods they’ve made.” The ultimate indictment of us all: “Every cop is a criminal, and all the sinners saints. I’ll tell ya one time, you’re to blame.” Man, how perfect is that? And how true?

I do not subscribe to the belief that Satan is the one causing evil on our planet. That is purely our own doing, and this song articulates that perfectly: we invented Satan to explain our own flaws and our own capacity for hatred and evil. WE are what is evil in this world, and there is no sympathy for us, as long as we allow the evil to continue.

“Sympathy for the Devil” is everything that is right and true in rock and roll. It’s not just a great groove...it’s the basic truth of the world distilled into less than ten minutes. It is my favorite song.