Beth's Books: A Higher Loyalty

Those who know me understand that I am more than a little biased towards James Comey. I find him credible and honorable. I will do my best to write this review in the spirit of fairness and openness and—

OMG I LOVED THIS BOOK SO MUCH!

Okay, okay, I'll admit that there is a fair amount of confirmation bias in my love for this book. I despise the "president" and I like Comey very much. Nothing in this book changed my feelings or thoughts about either. 

What struck me is that Comey seems very genuine. Whether he writes about his experiences with bullies when he was a kid, or about when he behaved in a bullying manner when he got to college because of 'groupthink' (something he says he remains ashamed of even all these years later), you can tell that it was part of what shaped his worldview. I have said all along that Trump is a schoolyard bully and Comey seems to have had that feeling, too. "All bullies are largely the same. They threaten the weak to feed some insecurity that rages inside them." Very true. 

Comey admits to struggling as an adult with ego and over-confidence. It seems obvious that he also has enough self-awareness to realize that about himself and does his best to counteract that by encouraging others to confront him and push back against his preconceived notions, whether it is his wife or President Obama. 

I found him quite funny and enjoyed the stories about the "presidential apple" for his youngest daughter, learning tips for cooking turkeys from Martha Stewart's shows, and especially his recounting of the infamous curtain incident when he tried to blend into the curtains in the Blue Room. His abiding love for the FBI is also apparent (he even dedicated the book to all the men and women of the Bureau). As someone on Twitter said, "Get yourself a man who loves you the way Comey loves the FBI." 

I also found him deeply philosophical as he recounted his reasoning behind the decisions he made during the 2016 election. I've felt all along that he made the choices he did in order to protect the nonpartisanship and integrity of both the FBI and the DOJ, and he talks about that at length. I think he really was faced with a Scylla and Charybdis moment, not once, but a few times, and he made the only decision he could. 

I get frustrated at hearing the pundits on both sides say that "he should have done this" or "he shouldn't have said that." Or he shouldn't have said it when he did. He has explained over and over how he came to the decisions he did (although there is still some classified stuff out there that he can't disclose). I find his thought processes credible and well-reasoned in the context of doing what was best for the FBI/DOJ and their nonpartisanship. It is easy to second guess someone when you've never been in such a position. There is also a ridiculous amount of semantics involved, especially among those illiterate in legalese. I am certainly not literate in that language but when he explained the subtle difference in legal terms and why they matter, I understood. 

I also enjoyed his thoughts on intelligence vs judgment. It's one thing to have the intelligence to understand facts and figures, to understand something intellectually, but it has to be tempered with good judgment and the ability to look at a problem from other perspectives. He recounts a great conversation with President Obama in which they discussed the Black Lives Matter/Blue Lives Matter movements and the conflicts between young black men and law enforcement. They each got each other to see certain views from other vantage points. That is the mark of true thinkers, the ability for self-reflection, self-awareness, and the ability to approach things with a sense of humility and accept that there are other ways of looking at things that wouldn't occur to you because of your own life experience. 

Oh, how I love to have those types of discussions myself! Going deeper than the easy, superficial talking points and bouncing ideas off of each other. Getting someone to understand your viewpoint and getting them to understand yours, and finding points of consensus when you realize that you both hold many of the same thoughts. We seem to have lost that recently. I miss it. 

I admire and respect some of the same people that he does, including President Obama and James Clapper. I also despise some of the same people that he seems to, including Dick Cheney (who comes across every bit as evil and humorless as I've always thought) and the current "president." Comey doesn't use the word 'despise,' but his disdain and visceral dislike for both comes across loud and clear. 

I think Comey is right when he says that while Trump might not be medically unfit to serve, he is morally unfit. He is devoid of ethics and does not possess the ability to provide ethical leadership. Comey was reminded over and over of his dealings with Mafia bosses earlier in his career and I think the comparison is a suitable one. Trump cares not one whit about societal and political norms, nor about defending the Constitution. He cares only about how things will affect him and about uncompromising loyalty to HIM. People like Comey and professionals in the FBI and DOJ are utterly foreign and incomprehensible to him: people who took an oath to the country and the Constitution, not to any particular person. 

In interviews, Comey has said that he sees this as a situation where we need to put our moral and ethical values—who we are as Americans and human beings—above partisan politics and issues, whether it's gun control or tax cuts. I couldn't agree more. I disagree with the right on so many things but can we get back to the place where we all agree that we value the basic premises of free speech and other Constitutional rights above partisanship? I believe we must if we are to move forward and be our best selves. 

I think that a leader who expects fealty to himself rather than respect for the rule of law cannot be part of that equation. 

Vote accordingly, Citizens. 

Not your normal Sunday

Normally, I'd be calling this Dead Day, because it's the Season 8 finale of "The Walking Dead" and the Season 4 premiere of "Fear the Walking Dead."

But there is a little more going on today because it is officially the start of...

COMEY WEEK. [trumpets]

It started unofficially at the end of last week as excerpts from his book started to leak [snicker] to the press and his publishers lifted the media embargo. We got a few video snippets and learned pretty quickly that Comey is pulling no punches.

As much as I love the Dead Universe, there is no way I won't watch the Comey interview tonight. I'll miss the first ten minutes because "The Walking Dead" finale will go past 10 PM, but I'll catch the rest of it later.

It's been a weird fucking week and one of the weirdest things is that despite the serious things happening in the Middle East, the "president" seems to be more preoccupied with James Comey and his upcoming book. He lashed out on Twitter (of course) this morning and it's obvious that Comey has really gotten under his thin orange skin. If it weren't so disturbing and pathetic, it would be funny. (Okay, it's a little bit funny.)

I understand that people are conflicted about Comey. His legacy is a complicated one. I've seen people on CNN both defend him and denigrate him for what he is doing. (The Yamstooges at Fox are calling him a "dirty cop" and shit like that. No surprise there.) He is getting criticism for being too snarky and petty about the "president." I've made it clear that I like Comey and find him admirable, so I say, "You GO with your bad self!" Snark away!

Obviously, I don't know the man personally, but I've read enough about him and listened to enough of his lectures that my gut feeling is that he is a person of integrity. I can only imagine his visceral disgust as he encountered the Yam for the first time, but I can imagine it pretty well because I felt it, too. I've learned to spot bullshitters and I'm sure that Comey is better at spotting them than I am. I don't doubt that he knew from the moment he met him that this is a guy who goes against everything that Comey holds dear, whether it is justice, honesty, devotion to family, or the general concept of how no one should be or IS above the law.

I can't help but laugh as I think about how Comey's media blitz this week is going to drive the "president" absolutely nuts. You think the tweetstorm of the past few days was bad? Wait for this week. It's gonna be a wild ride.

We have tickets to see Comey in Chicago next Friday and I can hardly wait. The event is sold out and I could probably sell each ticket for a grand. I wouldn't dream of it! I will take notes and report back soon.

Buckle up!

The "president" is a middle school Mean Girl

You called down the thunder.
Well, now you've got it!

~~ Kurt Russell as Wyatt Earp in "Tombstone"

The current occupant of the Oval Office is gloating about the firing of Andrew McCabe, the FBI Deputy Director who was going to retire tomorrow, a guy who spent over twenty years serving his country with the FBI. This puts McCabe's pension in jeopardy.

I cannot begin to convey how much this infuriates and sickens me. The "president" has been bitching about McCabe for months, flat-out saying that he's partisan and part of some stupid deep state conspiracy to take him down. This is such a petty and vindictive action that it boggles my mind. 

Listen, I haven't seen the internal FBI report that recommended that McCabe be fired, so I don't know the whole story. But the timing of this absolutely smacks of attempting to silence a member of the intelligence community. Under normal circumstances, I don't doubt for a second that the FBI and DOJ would have said, "Hey, the guy is retiring, let's just let him retire and then issue a report saying that disciplinary action would have been taken if he had stayed on." 

But no. The "president" decided that McCabe had to go and pressured the spineless Attorney General Sessions to do the dirty deed. Sessions decided to toady up and try to save his own hide by doing the bidding of his boss. Woe to all who associate themselves with this toxic "president." You will be tainted forever and history will not be kind to you. 

There are bigger implications here. First, I don't think this will play well with anyone other than the "president's" rabid base. Most people will see someone who served his country honorably for over two decades and think that he got a raw deal. 

Second, the men and women of the FBI have seen some of the worst things and worst people in the world. They pursue them doggedly and do not rest until they see that justice is done. Does the "president" really think that they are scared of him? 

Finally, and this is related to the second item, piss off the FBI at your own peril. The "president" has repeatedly questioned their integrity and honesty and seems to think that they owe him their loyalty. That's not how it works, idiot. These attacks against well-liked and well-respected members of the Bureau like James Comey and Andrew McCabe are going to backfire. The FBI will close ranks and protect each other and they will not let their reputation as the best law enforcement agency in the world be besmirched. Just like Comey, McCabe has memos and has turned them over to Robert Mueller. 

My BF in an alternate universe was none too happy and tweeted his response. 

But Wyatt Earp said it best.

Stormy Eyes

And Windy has stormy eyes
That flash at the sound of lies

~~ "Windy" by The Association

What an exhausting week. 

It's not that I've been physically stressed, or sick, or partying every night, or anything like that. I'm exhausted by the news cycle. While I'm heartened by the sight of hundreds of thousands of young people marching to protest gun violence (and look forward to marching with them on March 24th), I find myself tired of the constant drama coming from the White House. 

I miss No Drama Obama. So much. 

So I feel absolutely zero guilt in finding a sort of disgusted glee in the story of the "President" and the Porn Star, and I am cheering on Stormy Daniels every step of the way.



A few things:

1. I'm no fan of the porn industry and I think it demeans women and causes a skewed concept of sexuality that often genuinely harms women. But I'm not going to be super judgmental about it because whatever floats people's boats is okay with me, as long as it doesn't harm others. I don't think that is the case with the porn industry and I do think that it causes harm to others, but that is an ongoing debate and I'm not going to try to hash it out here. 

2. Having said that, I like what I hear from Ms. Daniels. She knows who she is, she is comfortable with herself, she has a thick skin, and she is not taking crap from anybody. I don't know what her game is, whether she is looking to cash in, or what, but I say more power to her. She has been quite successful in her chosen field, and while it's not one that I would wish on any woman, it seems that she is a savvy businesswoman and I admire that. Kudos to her and her lawyer for keeping this story in the news. A masterclass in media manipulation.

3. I don't give a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut if the "president" has had affairs in the past. It is common knowledge that he has. It's not the most admirable trait in the world, but that's between him and his wife. What I DO care about is that he and his flunkies have actively worked to pay off, cover up, and sweep this under the rug. Such activities have left him open to extortion and blackmail, and I suspect that is what is behind much of the weirdness about Russia's influence. 

Finally, I care about the complete and utter hypocrisy of those people who said that Bill Clinton was incapable of doing a decent job because of his affairs. I was no fan of all of that but at least he was competent at what he did and he had the intellectual capacity to learn about what he didn't know. 

I am disgusted by those evangelicals who have embraced this "president" and give him a pass for this stuff. I dealt with years of guilt because of things I was taught to believe would send me on a one-way ticket to hell. Lying, cheating, cussing, drinking, stealing, smoking, dancing, premarital sex, gambling, listening to rock and roll...every freakin' thing that is halfway fun, and it was all hell-worthy. And here comes this happy asshole with his affairs and bankruptcies and shittiness towards POWs and the disabled and his cussing and they're like, "Oh, we LOVE you!" 

[flipping table over]

It kind of makes me crazy. Hypocrites make me crazy. 

All I can say is, go Team Mueller and go Team Stormy! 

A Shift

And these children that you spit on
As they try to change their worlds
Are immune to your consultations
They're quite aware of what they're going through

~~ "Changes" by David Bowie

Since the shooting in Parkland on Friday, I have been very emotional. Ken would say, "How is that different from every day?" Fair enough. I've been more emotional than I usually am. 

The shooting itself was obviously horrific and worthy of tears. But you know what is really getting to me?

Seeing these kids speak up and speak out. Their words are powerful. Their resolve is powerful. 

THEY are powerful. 

I honestly don't know what will happen. The Florida state legislature refused to take up a ban on assault weapons today. But I don't think these remarkable young people are done yet. 

And doesn't something feel different this time? I think it does. 

After Sandy Hook, it felt different, too. I submitted a petition to the White House site (this is back when the White House cared about people) to ban assault rifles and high-capacity clips. I got some support but not enough to generate a response from the White House. I thought for sure that after 20 kids were gunned down, our Congress would act. 

I was wrong. 

This feels different. This feels like a seismic shift in this debate, much like the MeToo movement felt like a seismic shift in our culture about how we treat women. 

It was dismaying today to see the attacks on these kids, often from Russian bots and trolls, but also from the "president's" idiot son, Junior. Accusing them of being deep state shills and other such nonsense. How utterly disgusting, and utterly unsurprising, to see these people dismiss and discount these kids' genuine horror, rage, and sorrow at seeing their friends and classmates gunned down in cold blood. 

The "president" blamed the FBI for devoting too much time on the Russian investigation. Sure, because the FBI has only one investigation and only a handful of employees. Over 12,000 agents and over 35,000 employees can multitask, asshole. A pox on you and your horrible family.

On April 20th, the twentieth anniversary of the Columbine shooting, kids are planning a nationwide walk-out. On March 24th, they are planning a march on Washington, D.C., and I am hopeful that there will be marches all across the country, including in my own city. I will be proud to join them. 

Again, I have no idea what will happen. But this really does feel different. I think people have had it with the NRA, which used to be an organization that taught gun safety for hunters and advocated for responsible gun ownership. They've turned into shills for the gun manufacturers and the gun lobby and as far as I'm concerned, they are a terrorist organization. Fuck you, NRA, and fuck you, Wayne LaPierre. There is so much blood on your hands that you will never erase the stain. 

A ch-ch-ch-change is coming. 

Beth's Books: A Political Two-fer

I'm a little consumed with politics right now and the two books I've read so far have both been political books. Why only two books so far? Especially when I have a goal of 52 every year? I'll explain in a moment.

But I'll say now that I realize that I need to step away from political books for a bit and get back into reading for sheer pleasure. Something that takes me away rather than depositing me directly in the midst of the current shitshow that is American politics.

I probably read a short book every day with all the political stories I read. It is probably time to get back to reading some fiction, some science books, and even political books, but maybe from a historical viewpoint. I have a copy of All the President's Men to read.

Not that that has anything to do with what is happening now.

The first book I read this year was Collusion: Secret Meetings, Dirty Money, and How Russia Helped Donald Trump Win by Luke Harding.

My initial thought after reading this book was that this entire administration is rotten to the core. It is a well-researched book that provides all the sordid details of the questionable Russian dealings of people like Paul Manafort and Carter Page. It is no surprise that Robert Mueller has charged Manafort with multiple counts. I suspect that there will be more to come.

I was also struck by the sheer arrogance of people like Manafort who seem to think that they won't be caught. I look forward to watching Mueller reduce him to mincemeat.

The second book is the current NYT nonfiction #1, Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House by Michael Wolff.

I've often thought about how much I would love to talk to certain politicians or people in that arena. The Obamas. The Clintons. The Bidens. John McCain and Jeff Flake, even. People like James Comey and Robert Mueller. People who are intelligent, informed, thoughtful, have interesting viewpoints and interesting stories, even if I don't necessarily agree with their viewpoints.

I've been fortunate enough to talk to a few here and there. My Mayor, Pete Buttigieg, is a super smart, great guy. I've had a chance to talk with the former Speaker of the House of the Indiana state legislature, Pat Bauer. I've gotten to say hello to one of my Senators, Joe Donnelly. I even had a nice conversation with Martin O'Malley, who was smart and engaging and asked me and Ken about some Indiana political issues.

It took me forever to read this book because I realized how completely boring the "president" is. He is not smart. He is not informed. He doesn't have a thought in his head other than how something relates to him. He has no idea how to engage or connect with others.

He's the guy who, if I were talking to him at a party, I'd figure out a way to extricate myself because I'd be rolling my eyes at his complete and utter self-absorption and lack of intellect.

The only enjoyable parts of this book were the ones about James Comey and Robert Mueller because they seemed to be the only ones in the whole thing with a shred of decency and integrity. (Also because of my Comey Crush.)

I can't NOT recommend it but I can say that it was not a particularly edifying read.

If you had to pick between the two, choose the former. There is a lot more research and detail there.

Happy (sort of) reading and remember to vote in your primaries and in November. 

Pussy Grabs Back

All my life I've never seen
A woman so damn mean

~~ "All Day And Night" by Shake Before Us

Even dummies are woke

Well, it's been quite a year. 

I'm not going to get into the government shutdown because there is just too much to write about that. We'll see what happens tonight and early Monday morning. 

I want to write about the Women's March of this weekend. I was truly bummed that we didn't have a local one this year. Matt and I would absolutely have gone! (Ken was out of town and Shane was working.) I still remember the energy, positivity, and hope that I felt when we marched a year ago today. I saw all my posts from last year show up in my memories on Facebook and it was a great reminder of how this movement started. It was very much a backlash to an admitted sexual predator being inaugurated as our 45th president. We all felt disgusted and dismayed, but one day after the inauguration, we marched and raised our voices and said, "We are a force to be reckoned with." 

How wonderful and empowering to see that we have not lost that energy. In fact, it has only picked up. More women than ever are running for political office all over the country, from local township offices to Governor to Congresswoman to Senator to (probably) President. Shit's about to get real. 

A friend and local operative with the Democrats reached out to me and asked me if I'd be interested in running for a local office. He said he thought I'd be a great campaigner and candidate, and I found that incredibly flattering. Just the fact that he thought I have a good grasp of the issues, you know? I thanked him but said that I am way too much of an introvert to be able to do that. I can engage with people for a limited time and then I am done. Push me beyond that limit and I'm the one rolling my eyes and saying, "That's a really dumb question." Ha! He understood and said that that is why HE doesn't run and instead works behind the scenes to recruit people. I do wish that I could be more engaging with others, but I know my limits.

The happy ending here is that I have two friends who are running for local office, Cassie and Jennica. They both have been heavily involved with the healthcare debate as they are both mothers of preemies (triplets in Jennica's case) and have faced numerous hurdles as they try to navigate and find the best care for their kids. I couldn't be prouder of them and for them and I look forward to helping them as we move into this next election. 

Make no mistake about it. Women are pissed off and we are ready to fight and make our voices heard. 

2018 is the year that pussy grabs back. Buckle up!