Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Does this mean you don’t love me anymore?

Defriend I'm getting a fairly large network of friends on Facebook, so it's impossible for me to keep track of everyone. There are quite a few people whose posts I enjoy and comment on and some very good friends on there, and there are some that rarely post. If some of my closer friends and regular posters weren't to post for a while, I would check up on them, but for those who don't often post anything, I don't track their comings and goings. I am not my Facebook friend's keeper, after all.

So I didn't think anything of it when I never saw any posts from a couple of people I went to high school with and had become friends with a while back. I've seen people get on Facebook and not do much with it; not enough time, lose interest, that sort of thing. I think I left a couple of comments early on, probably just saying it was nice to see them on there, maybe commenting about a football game, and I believe at one point I mentioned getting older. (Since we're all roughly the same age, I feel that's a legitimate comment!) I was amused to realize a while later, after seeing the page of a mutual friend, that these people had defriended me. Not only that, but one had actually blocked me! Hahaha!

Now, I know I can be very opinionated on here and on Facebook. I assure you that I said nothing on this person's page that was offensive or in any way controversial. I engaged in no political or religious discussions with them whatsoever. Of course, they probably saw some of my posts and maybe even read my blog and decided that they just didn't want to be my friend. I really don't have a problem with that--I understand that I'm not for everyone--and I have been known to defriend a person or two because of a fundamental disagreement. I don't do it often, but I have done it.

But to block me? Just because I'm opinionated? I was not harassing or even contacting this person after an initial "Hi, how are you?" This makes me think that I am doing something right, and it kind of makes me grin. Whatever I posted that was offensive to this person must have shaken their belief system (both religious and political) enough to get them all agitated. Yes, it wouldn't do to be exposed to any sort of alternate viewpoint. Best not to even see it!

Recently, I received a friend request from another high school friend. Again, it was a quick hello, nice to see you, an agreement that we hadn't seen each other since high school. This was a genuinely nice person, and we were pretty good friends in junior high, and I saw that it looked like they had some pretty strong religious beliefs...so I put them into my group that I sometimes exclude from certain posts that I think might be too offensive. I swear, it wasn't a couple of days before I saw (as before, through a mutual friend's page) that they had also defriended me!

Again, I am not upset by this. If anything, I find it funny. Cousin Shane and I have often talked about how it's odd that out of so many of our conservative, religious classmates and family, we ended up as neither of those things. Considering the area we live in, it's no surprise that the majority are conservative, and the majority in the U.S. are still religious. I suppose I do find it a little sad, to think that someone would be so offended? intimidated? afraid? of my opinions that they would simply choose rather to not see them. And it's kind of silly, because you can hide people's posts from your feed. On the rare occasion that I've defriended someone, it's been because I either wasn't interested at all in their posts, because they were friends only because of games, or because there was a very basic fundamental disagreement with which I just couldn't reconcile. So I guess if I look at it that way, I can understand why they would defriend me...if they had that sort of fundamental disagreement with my viewpoints, then it is certainly their right to do so. Guess I shouldn't waste my time going to any high school reunions, eh? (I have yet to go to one, and I do not regret that one little bit.)

There are a few friends from that era that are like-minded individuals, and that's nice to know. I know I'm not the only one from around here who feels this way!

And just to make me feel even more loved, warm, and fuzzy, my stalker (and occasionally her sister) are still checking me, my stalker usually a couple of times a day. It's good to be wanted, isn't it? It's really too bad they aren't writing anymore, because that was some pretty entertaining shit. Oh well, some people just don't have the fortitude, the stamina, the ideas, or perhaps just the smarts, to keep writing. Nice to know she still loves me, though.

14 comments:

  1. Did you ever stop to think that maybe these people just hate Batman?

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  2. Re: Last Paragraph

    Darling, I just love it when you "shit-stir" (as we would say here in NYC). LOL!!

    XOXOXOXO

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  3. How can you tell someone blocked you? I found out someone unfriended me because I wasn't on her list any more.

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  4. Friends come and go (mostly go it seems, in my world) for various reasons. I think I offend people by simply being who I am. Maybe you do too. I just shrug my shoulders and get on with life.
    D

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  5. These are just a bunch of morons who needed to be weeded out of your life. Social media makes it so much easier!

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  6. now beth,if i didnt know you better i would say you were stirring it as well,lol.oh dear.still that old story huh?? i lost 2 "friends "on fb because i "took the name of our lord in vain".i has used omg,(and yes i know you know it stands for OH MY GOD,lol,some may not)on someone elses post and they saw it.ON SOMEONE ELSES POST.not theirs.and were kind enough to send me messages telling me they were praying for my soul,as i was surely heading straight for hell. my reply was,if i remember rightly, i am already living it with MS,so **** off.lol.i get bitchy when the menopause is causing me probs.lol.keep yew a writin,n i'll keep a readin,take care beth,love mort xxxx and if that troll pops up on my blog,ive got a big hammer waiting,lmao

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  7. There are certain capitulations to social norms(well,what is viewed as norm by each subjective mind or group mind)that must be honored according to whole segments of the Internet "communities."

    If you don't do that(& I never did, either), boo hoo...they hate you.
    I mentioned the compliant herd on someone else's blog comments...same holds here.
    I consider your not being a member of the herd a good thing. I don't always agree with you~many times not, but I don't hate you for it. Anyone that does is reacting to their own internal problems. ~Mary

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  8. I think there is a vast differance between the two words Aquaintances and Friends.. Aquaintances are an odd lot it seems to me, they seem to want to be around us but only if we agree with what they say think etc..now Friends true friends usually agree with each other and even when we don't it makes not one whit of differance to our Friendship.. We can afford to loose many aqaintances we never loose our friends.
    Love Sybil x

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  9. How do you know someone blocked you?

    I love David's comment! LOL

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  10. I do not do the Face Book thing. I do not have the time. I do not even think that I have a space there. I am just happy with my small entries on my blog. I can say and write about topics that generally, with some small exceptions cause others to respond. Your visits to my blog, are significant to me.

    And you know that I love when you "shit" on your blog. From you is very smart.

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  11. I guess you did shake people to their core and perhaps after inspection, they sought to minimize their exposure to contrary ideas to their belief system.

    Here is an interesting read. I know I have long agreed with the writers of scripture, given what I know about man and how I understand his mind to work.

    http://blackpoliticalthought.blogspot.com/search?q=bart+ehrman

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  12. Hi Beth,
    Here's another theory about the people who "defriended" you on Facebook: It might be that their own news feeds were getting too cluttered (in other words, it might have had nothing to do with what you were posting, just that they felt the need to limit their news feed). As for the "stalker," you crack me up. After finally getting her to stop with her ridiculous, "anonymous" comments, now it almost sounds like you miss them. Granted, they were highly entertaining, but ...
    Best,
    Marty

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  13. I find that people on the net are more touch than in person and it's easier to switch them off, I just wonder when did we all become so sensitive.

    Take care

    Yasmin
    xx

    PS keep stirring the pot:)

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I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you?