The danger of prayer revisited

A follow-up to yesterday's entry, addressing a couple of comments.

First of all, thanks to all of you who left thoughtful comments and understand where I'm coming from about this topic. For anyone who found my remarks disagreeable, I am not against prayer, by any means. Hey, knock yourself out. My point is that it doesn't work. Show me proof that it works. Show me an amputee that grows a new leg because of prayer. Then we'll talk.

My goal is not to get anyone to stop praying if that brings you comfort; I know many people that feel that way, and I would never take that away from them. But I would love it if my words made someone stop and think—critically think—about their actions and the results. Think about the inconsistencies in your god answering some prayers but ignoring others. Ask yourself how much sense it makes to believe that a "merciful" god would let one child be saved while another dies.

I had an exchange with someone who said that I was an idiot and that I didn't know what I was writing about. Gee, really? I write something that is my opinion, based on my experiences, and is something that I've pondered for decades, eventually coming to the philosophy that I hold today (a constantly evolving philosophy, by the way), and I don't know what I'm talking about? I would think that I would know, since I was there as I had all these experiences, I was there as family members prayed futilely for a miracle, I was there doing the work as I saw patients succumb to overwhelming infections, I was there as I watched as thousands of soldiers were killed and wounded and brain damaged in wars. I'm willing to bet that those people all had loved ones praying for them. What sort of psychotic god allows one person to live and another to have half of his head blown off? What god deems some worthy and others unworthy? If I sound angry, I am. Don't tell me about the power of prayer.

The only thing that prayer works for is your own comfort. I won't take that away from anyone who needs it. But for actually making a difference, actually resulting in a miracle...like I said: show me that regenerated limb, and then we'll talk.

Another comment (and I am not picking on this person or intending any sort of ridicule...they have the right to their opinion, but I also have the right to refute it) stated that my attitudes expressed here are more scary and saddening than any legislator trying to solve problems through prayer. What exactly is so scary about it? My encouraging everyone to think for themselves, rather than succumb to blind faith and dogma? I suppose that would be kind of scary, especially for women like I wrote about yesterday, who was so happy to have her god making decisions for her so she wouldn't have to make them on her own. That is what I find pathetic, that anyone would willingly give up control of their own destiny and the ability to make their own path through life based upon their decisions, their abilities, their strength, and their fortitude. Freedom in religion? The only real freedom I ever felt in religion is when I got away from it. There is no freedom in dogma, there is no freedom in indoctrination, there is no freedom in being subjected to archaic laws that discriminate and subjugate women and so many others.

You know what scares me? Politicians and others who would force their religion on everyone else. I've written about this several times before, but it bears repeating. Our government cannot constitutionally mandate or promote any religion. Just because you believe that your religion is the "correct" one doesn't make it so, and doesn't mean that the government is under any obligation to force your religion upon others; quite the opposite. If you feel the need to condemn me because I don't subscribe to your particular brand, I have to wonder at your willingness to judge. I have the right to tell you exactly why I disagree with you. I also have the right to demand that my legislators actually DO something to solve a problem rather than declaring some ridiculous day of prayer. I don't want to hear about pleas to their god, I want to see active work on solving the problem, I want to see ideas, I want to see results. Get off your knees and do something!

If anyone feels the need to pray for me, don't waste your time. Instead of my salvation, I'd much rather you thought about all the misery and woe that is happening in our world, and then realize that praying isn't doing one goddamn bit of good. Maybe then you'll take a few moments and consider contributing to organizations like Nothing But Nets, Malaria No More, Doctors Without Borders, or the Gates Foundation. Malaria killed 863,000 people worldwide in 2008, 91% of them in Africa; 1 in 5 of those deaths was in children. It costs ten dollars to buy an insecticide-treated malaria net for a family, and that ten dollars will save lives. The Gates Foundation is run by Bill and Melinda Gates. You might have heard of Bill...among other things, he's an atheist who has given millions in efforts to help alleviate suffering worldwide. One of the Gates Foundation's biggest donors is Warren Buffett, another atheist.

I would say that in about 15 years of existence, the Gates Foundation, funded primarily by two godless heathens, has saved more people—and has signed on to keep developing and funding ways in which to help people in the future—than prayer has in centuries. They don’t pray. They DO. Actions speak louder than words.

This seems like an appropriate time for a classic Devo song: "Praying Hands."

You got your left hand
You got your right hand
The left hand's diddling
While the right hand goes to work
You got both hands
You got praying hands
They pray for no man
(roll over, play dead, get spiritual-minded)
Okay, relax
And assume the position
Go into doggie submission
Wash your hands three times a day
Always do what your mom and dad say
Brush your teeth in the following way
Wash your hands three times a day

The danger of prayer

Yes, you heard me.

A big story among my Facebook friends recently was that the state legislature has designated Sunday as a day of prayer in Louisiana, hoping for divine intervention concerning the disastrous oil spill.

"Thus far efforts made by mortals to try to solve the crisis have been to no avail," state Sen. Robert Adley said in a statement released after last week's unanimous vote for the day of prayer. "It is clearly time for a miracle for us."

The resolution names Sunday as a statewide day of prayer in Louisiana and calls on people of all religions throughout the Gulf Coast "to pray for an end to this environmental emergency, sparing us all from the destruction of both culture and livelihood."

Of course, Sarah Palin had to weigh in with a tweet: "Gulf disaster needs divine intervention as man's efforts have been futile. Gulf lawmakers designate today Day of Prayer for solution/miracle."

I honestly do not understand this sort of thinking. I spent far too many years seeing dear relatives die of cancer after hearing people pray for a miracle (after treatment failure); pleas for divine intervention rather than putting our own knowledge to use, or doing further research in order to find ways to help others; and prayerful requests for finding a missing child, hoping that just this once, God will spare this one...apparently either ignoring the hundreds of others who go missing every year, or even worse, deeming them unworthy of being rescued.

Why do I say this is dangerous? Oh, I know it really doesn't hurt, and I know that many find it a comfort. I don't deny anyone that. However, I find that relying on a mystical solution to a very real and present danger does no good in finding a real time solution, and can even retard (and I use that word correctly) progress.

Years ago, I remember talking with a woman at a potluck dinner; this was the ex's church group. (Feel free to have a chuckle at imagining me at this group.) She said, "I'm glad I have God to make decisions for me, so I don't have to make them for myself!" I think I died a little inside at hearing her say that. I have never forgotten it, and I can tell you that I never want to be that way. To quote Nine Inch Nails, "I'd rather die than give you control."

You can approach this in two different ways. If you don't believe in God, you understand that your destiny is in your own hands. It is entirely up to you to make the decisions that concern your life; the responsibility lies upon you. You learn to make decisions based on the outcome of your previous decisions. If the consequences turn out badly, you learn to make different choices. If you never learn, you are the one that will ultimately deal with the results of your own bad decisions. In my life, I have made both good and bad decisions (as have we all). I accept full responsibility for them, I own them, and I will deal with the consequences. I don't accept blame for the behavior of others, but I do accept my own response to such behavior. I'm like the Outer Limits, baby. I control the horizontal. I control the vertical.

If one does believe in God, as did the woman who was so delighted to have God making decisions for her, I have to wonder at her selfishness in wanting God's ear in order to have him be the decider. This was a comfortable suburbanite, a woman not lacking in food, shelter, health care, or any other amenities; my mind was and is blown at her arrogance in assuming that her petty little problems trump those of the mother in Africa whose child is dying of malaria, or is starving to death, or is slowly but inexorably dying due to an overwhelming parasitic infection. Or for that matter, the woman right here in New York or Chicago or L.A. who is seeing her child starve, or watching them die because they don't have reliable health care. Yes, it happens right here.

I've always felt that if there is a god, he'd get pretty impatient with people praying for guidance as to whether or not they should buy that new car or stick with the old one a while longer, or praying for their team to win the Super Bowl, or praying for an answer to that age-old dilemma...Dear Lord, should I get a boob job? Guide me, Jeebus!

We have brains, people. We have reasoning, thinking minds. Personally, I believe that came about through evolution, but even if you believe in the alternative, you still have a mind and life experiences with which to make your own decisions. Use these things!

A little story for you. Got a call Sunday morning when someone couldn't find their keys. They'd looked everywhere, and they were nowhere to be found. Got another call later on, and the keys were still missing. I started walking through the steps of when I saw them last, retracing our movements and activities, and I eventually hit upon something that triggered a memory. The keys were found. The response? "Praise the Lord!"

Before you get your undies in a bundle, no, I'm not saying that I wanted or needed praise at this moment, and I am most certainly not comparing myself to any deity; I was just very happy that the keys were found. My point is that I led them to find the keys by using logic and reconstruction; there was no divine guidance involved.

Relying solely on prayer for the solution to problems is foolish and dangerous. When it comes to a disaster like the oil spill, it is even more so; there will be no "divine intervention" in this oil spill. It was caused by human failures and greed, and it will eventually be solved by human ingenuity and technical knowledge (although too late to save so much of the region's wildlife, ecosystem, and the residents' livelihoods). The Louisiana legislature's declaration of a statewide day of prayer is not only unconstitutional (they "urged" people to pray, which they cannot do according to our Constitution), it is a futile effort and distraction from the task at hand. Palin's endorsement of the prayer and belief that it is the only possible solution to this clusterfuck is utterly absurd.

Take control. Be responsible for your weaknesses and your strengths. OWN your life and know that you have the ability to control how you respond to personal disasters. Realize that disasters are either caused by natural phenomena or by our own negligence; tornadoes, hurricanes, et al, are not divine retribution for sin, they are caused by weather patterns, and in the case of this oil spill, by ignoring regulations and warning signs. Illnesses are sometimes random, sometimes caused by our own behavior. Stop blaming random shit on whatever god you worship and stop expecting that he will intervene on your behalf.

Believe in yourself.

And watch this video, a response from a Gulf resident, to the "drill, baby, drill" mentality. My reaction was a mixture of grief and rage.