High anxiety

Are we all getting settled in?

I feel so behind...I can barely keep up with the emails about all of this stuff! For my friends from work who have emailed me, I'll get back to you as soon as possible! And for all of the folks I read, I'll get to reading your latest soon.

I've been trying to update my new info on places like Technorati, and I think I'm getting that kind of stuff taken care of. I still need to send out a mass email to relatives to tell them about the Big Move of '08. Ha ha!

I've also managed to get some things done today--a trip to the grocery store, washing a few dishes, and getting the load of laundry in the dryer folded. That would be the load that I totally forgot about last night! Agh! We also ate really late last night because we were both working on this, and I think that's why I had some very strange dreams....

In one, I was in the house where I grew up. I was walking from the kitchen to the dining room, and I was wearing a white pantsuit with white heels--I looked at myself in the reflection of the sliding glass door, and thought I looked fairly good in my white pantsuit! I went over to the dining room table, took a cigarette out of a pack laying on the table. I struck a wooden match, lit the cigarette, and took a deep drag. I looked down at the table, and there was an entire carton laying there--Marlboro Lights, if I recall. Ken had a pack laying on the table, too. I remember thinking, "What are we doing? We QUIT smoking! We've got to stop this!" I was very anxiety- and guilt-ridden.

The other dream was a very brief one, but disturbing. When Ken leaves for work, he always comes in and kisses me good-bye. In my dream, he came in and was leaning over me, kissing me on the neck, and I touched his face. His face was covered up with a scarf or something...then I realized that Ken was still laying beside me in bed! AAAAHHH! I woke up with a start, and had a ripple of goosebumps flow over me. It was the creepiest feeling!

[putting on my dream analysis hat]

These two seem fairly straightforward. It's all about anxiety. Hearing that AOL was discontinuing journals, and the subsequent scramble for information and to get this new blog up and running meant for a crazy day. As many of you know, Ken and I quit smoking over two years ago (Yay for us!), but in times of stress, my brain reverts to what I used to do to relieve stress--pick up a cigarette. Of course, that resulted in feelings of guilt, and more anxiety. The creepy neck-kissing dream was just more anxiety, but in a scarier way.

I'm hoping that my dreams will be a little more pleasant tonight, and an earlier dinner should help! (This blog is a nonsmoking establishment, by the way. But feel free to step outside if you need to. :)