Whether it's the shooting in Tucson, which political party truly cares about the country, whether or not the health care law will help or harm our country, eyewitness accounts of crimes and criminals, or just personal issues, we all have an opinion, and we all have a perception that is influenced by our own biases and prejudices, as well as those of who surround us.
I suppose it's all a fascinating psychological study for anyone who wants to explore it, but that's not my field. I enjoy reading articles about cognitive dissonance, confirmation bias, and downright delusion, but I'm not qualified to give an authoritative take on it. Just my opinion.
I'm always willing to cut certain people some slack. I know that much depends upon the atmosphere in which you were raised, and I know that parents can be an affirmative or a destructive influence on their kids. I know that it's hard to break away from seeing things a certain way and to question belief systems that are deep and pervasive. I know that kids can be easily manipulated, especially when in an atmosphere of emotional turmoil and blackmail. I also know that as we get older, it's harder to question authority and to question truths that we have been conditioned to believe.
It's much harder for me to forgive young adults or middle-aged people who still have the ability to question and question HARD. Those who shouldn't be so set in their ways that they have become incapable of seeing other points of view, or having any sort of reasonable discussion about issues. Those who are either so blinded by their own hatred or so mentally weak and malleable that they can be easily manipulated by others. It's not unusual to see these types resort to puerile insults and name-calling.
No matter that events are twisted to justify their own misconceptions; no matter that their own actions are ignored or minimized; no matter that despite years of insults and anger, others are still expected to not only jump when demanded to, they are expected to ask, "How high? How much?"
Welcome to Reality™. Words and behaviors have consequences, and treating people badly, with rancor and disdain, will not make them do what you want them to do. Spin it whichever way you want, but such behavior will come back to bite you. You'd think some people would have figured that out by now. Apparently not. Don't come crying to me because you screw yourself over time after time, don't give me a sob story about how everyone hates you and everyone else is horrible, and quit bitching because you backed yourself into a corner that you can't get out of. Your bad behavior and ongoing bitterness are your own problems. Your poor negotiation skills are the result of years of misdirection and mistreatment, and an inability to let go of a grudge.
It's fascinating from a psychological viewpoint. But it's also kind of pathetic. And frankly, quite boring.
You already know my feelings on this, to bad, so sad :o) Discourse versus dialogue, dig your own hole.
ReplyDeleteI don't find it boring... a little fascinating... mostly sad. It says to me that people who are capable of forming an understanding refuse to do so, willingly.
ReplyDeleteBeth I've always been of the opinion that people aren't defined so much by what happens to them, but how they react to what happens to them. Some people don't have to ability to cope or are not as resilient as others. Does that mean that they are less responsible? Maybe in sometimes, but too often now that is simply used as an easy excuse for behavior the person could have changed, but chose not to.
ReplyDeleteYes, I think it might not be as boring as it is "old". There are always consequences to any action. When people don't consider what they might be, or just don't care, they often get into trouble, or cause someone else pain or harm. That's bad enough, but then the mentality is to justify, rather than apologize.
ReplyDeleteThat's the boring part. Sooooooooo predictable.