Takin’ Care of Business

Whoops, a few days without an entry here, but I’m not going to feel too bad about it, because it’s been a bit of a busy week for me. I’m looking forward to a day at home on Friday!

I’ve had three medical appointments in the past three days, and I have one more to go on Monday (the dentist). Good news on all fronts so far, with a negative mammogram, healthy eyes with no significant change from last year, and a good checkup with my doctor today. She is such a gem, and we even had a few laughs today. As we were finishing up, she said, “You’re doing great, and I’m happy that I don’t have to yell at you about anything!” I laughed and said, “And I’m happy to not be yelled at!”

I got my flu shot today, too. I have a slightly sore shoulder, but nothing major, and I’m always happy to get my flu shot taken care of. Happy to do it this early in the season, too! Everyone go get your flu shot, okay?

I’ve also had to make sure I was at home a couple of these afternoons, for a DirecTV technician (all fixed!) and a wine shipment (all delivered!). This is much more activity than I normally deal with, so I am ready for a down day!

I’ve been watching the shenanigans in Washington. And by ‘shenanigans,’ I mean the complete and utter batshittery of the Republican party right now. I’m not going to go into it at all here. I’m sure you’re all paying attention, and I’m also sure that you all know what I think about this bullshit and how disgusted I am.

What really astounds me is that all of this is because they want to keep millions of people from getting health insurance. I’ve been thinking about that a lot this week as I’ve gone to my various appointments to obtain preventive care. I’ve been fortunate in having employer-subsidized health insurance for my entire career. Since I worked in healthcare, it was always very good insurance, too. There were times when I paid maybe $10 a month for insurance. I usually had a copay, but that is still some pretty great insurance.

The reason I supported the Affordable Care Act from the beginning is because I want everyone to have that. I want everyone to have access to preventive care. I want everyone to get checkups and screenings and have a doctor that they can turn to when they have a medical problem. I don’t want anyone to be wiped out by medical bills, or have to declare bankruptcy because they get cancer or have a heart attack or a stroke, or whatever.

So while I watched the teabagger faction of the Republican party completely lose their shit this week, I also watched with joy as the exchanges opened on Tuesday and people began signing up. There are definitely problems with access, and some of that seems to be both volume and software. I am confident that these issues will be fixed soon. I have plenty of friends and family who may qualify for the exchanges and for subsidies, and my fingers are crossed for them.

As for the Republicans whose goal is to stop the Affordable Care Act, in the words of Austin Powers, that train has sailed.

I’m the princess of Canada!

There is a point to that title, a connection between Point A and Point B, but you'll have to wait a moment. It makes sense to me, but then I'm probably not thinking entirely clearly.

I won't make this too long, because I got up at six o'clock Sunday morning, and after getting about three hours of sleep, I'm amazed I didn't just curl up and die, but I did it. It was for a bus trip to Detroit to see the Lions play the Bears. A meaningless game, really, but fun to see Detroit again. (I may have to write more about the city at some point. It is a tragic tale of a great American city.) I'm glad I didn't pull an all-nighter like I thought about, because there was precious little sleeping to be done on the bus. Not only did the sun come up—I know, can you believe the nerve?—and shine right in my eyes, someone had the bright idea to show the movie "Valkyrie," and guess who was sitting right under a speaker? I was subjected to Tom Cruise and shit blowing up right in my ear after three hours of sleep, and that is not a good combination, believe me. I was okay, really, probably because I didn't have the energy to get pissed. Although at one point, a young girl asked her Dad about Hitler, and he said, "Well, you know how Obama is? Hitler was kind of like that but worse," or some such utter bullshit.

I kept my mouth shut at the time, but I can voice my displeasure here by saying what I would have liked to have said: "You fucking asshole. To make such a comparison is to diminish the misery of everyone who suffered at the hands of that monster, and shame on you for passing such ignorance, hatred, bigotry, and sheer fucktardedness on to your child. You suck."

There. I feel better.

So Ford Field is cool. I don't know if they do this for every game, or if it's because of the recent foiled bombing, but I actually got patted down before going into the stadium. The woman said, "I'm sorry, baby," and I said, "It's okay." This is the reality of our today, and no need to apologize, you know? It had been a long time since I'd been to a pro game (the last one was the Colts when they were still playing at the Hoosier Dome...before the name changed to the RCA Dome), and Ford Field is a great facility. Seats about 65,000, and it surprises me that Notre Dame stadium seats more! Everyone was really cool and nice. I was standing in the concourse, and a worker cruised by and said to me, "Hey, how are you? Happy New Year!" I said, "I'm good, thank you! And you, too!" I just love it when people are nice! Sitting in the bar before the game, started talking to a couple of Lions fans, both Ford employees. When I said I was on my fourth Mustang, I think they decided they liked me. One of the guys is also trying to travel to as many stadiums as possible, and he said the new LucasOil Stadium (home of my Colts) is his favorite so far. Cool! Everyone was just really friendly and cool.

Detroit is just across the river from Canada, and there were signs everywhere (signs, signs, everywhere signs) for the bridge to Canada. Even at Comerica Field, home of the Tigers, they were flying the Canadian flag. I gave a mental wave to my Canadian friends. :) Note the baseball in the mouth of the Tiger—I think that's so cute, and they're all along the baseball stadium exterior. There was a mention of the Windsor Ballet, and yeah, I got that reference. Oh, actually, I think I was the one who said it first!

Because of the proximity to Canada, all the vendors were selling...Labatt's Blue! (Note the picture of me above with my Labatt’s Blue.) Happy happy joy joy! It's only my favorite beer EVAH, and having it on tap made Beth a happy girl. The game was boring (yeah, I said it), because they weren't playing for anything. The Lions definitely aren't in the playoffs, and I'm not certain, but I don't think the Bears are, either. Most people were well-behaved and having fun (made a bet with a guy sitting next to me that the Colts wouldn't tank in the playoffs...wish I knew who he was, 'cause I am going to win that bet!), but there were the occasional disturbances. A group of guys were feeling way too good, and at one point, a bunch of cops (seven or eight of them) walked up to our section and seemed to be checking things out.

It was not because of me! I can't believe you would even think that.

Since I was so happy that they had Labatt's on tap, by the time the game was over and we all got back on the bus, I passed out slept the entire way back home. I think they had football on, but hell if I know. I was just happy I could sleep, and I was out like a light. Which is what I need to do here soon. (I really wasn’t that bad—just really tired!)

Oh! But I have to explain the title of the entry, and the thought processes that got me there. There were a couple of times that some guy drove one of these yellow carts out onto the sideline. It reminded me of one of my favorite scenes from the first Austin Powers movie, where Austin is trying to escape Dr. Evil's secret underground lair, and gets one of these stuck sideways in the hallway. The first time I saw it, I was crying with laughter, and it still never fails to crack me up. I couldn't find that scene, but I did find a deleted scene from Dr. Evil's appearance on the Jerry Springer show, and because of the Canadia Connection (heehee!) today, I thought I'd put it up here. It's not as good as the Shorn Scrotum monologue, but it's still fun.

LFA

I don't know if you all saw my friend Dan's comment, so I wanted to make sure you did:

Beth, your blog item about me and the pic and life at Ball State was too cool and a great birthday treat! I figured your entry would be short and sweet. Silly me! The entry was great! And just as cool as the photo and entry were all the friendly comments from your friends about my birthday. The coincidence of my birthday and the photo and your entry have left me nearly speechless! To all who wished me a happy birthday, thank you Big Time.

-dan(Formerly Guido;Currently CatManDude)

Thanks from me, too, for the nice birthday wishes for my friend. He got to see what a nice bunch you are. Hmm, he's a journalism major, maybe I can get him to start writing a blog...!

Do you all remember when we heard Karl Rove speak at the Economics Club dinner a while back? I wrote that even though it was Rove, it was pretty interesting, and I managed to not implode. Well, I had a note from Ken this morning that he got a pair of tickets for the next speaker, this Wednesday: Mike Huckabee.

If it seems like it's all about Republican speakers at this club, that's only because they can't have speakers who are currently in office, so there's a cycle of when an administration comes to an end, they get those speakers. Next year they're hoping to get Pres. Bush, and then Condi Rice. When the Clinton administration came to an end, they had Pres. Clinton and other Democrats. (I think before he announced he was running for President, they had Barack Obama.) It's definitely a conservative bunch, but they make it clear that they are nonpartisan, at least as far as choosing speakers.

I think I'll enjoy hearing Huckabee speak. I hear he's a pretty good speaker, and he impressed me a couple of times during the primaries. (When talking about allowing children of illegal immigrants to go to school, some of his fellow candidates said, in effect, no way, and Huckabee said, "We [the country] are better than that.") I'm also very pleased that this is happening just a couple of weeks before the election. It will be interesting to get his take on it. He has to know that things aren't looking good for their guy. Let's just hope the food isn't barfy this time, but I'm not going to get my hopes up!

Speaking of "their guy," I saw a video this morning of FoxNews's Chris Wallace interviewing McCain. Wallace asked him if he thought the choice of Sarah Palin was dragging down the campaign, or something like that. McCain said no, absolutely not, and "as a cold political calculation, I could not be more pleased." He went on to say that "she's a direct counterpoint to the liberal feminist agenda for America."

Dammit! He figured us out! For years, my sistahs and I have managed to keep our liberal feminist agenda (heretofore known as LFA) under the radar, but that crafty John McCain somehow infiltrated our ranks and now he's telling everyone about the LFA! Darn you, John McCain! [shaking fist] We would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you and your meddling!

This could ruin everything. All my early work with my great-niece might now be for naught. I started when she was just tiny, whispering things in her ear as she lay in her crib...things like, "Equal pay for equal work" and "Girls can be scientists." And it was working, too--she wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up. As soon as she got old enough to officially join the club, I was going to get my free toaster oven! (For each one we "turn," we get a toaster oven.) I've been trying to spread the word (quietly, of course), and I was doing so well that I was getting close to reaching LEFA status! (Liberal ELITE Feminist Agenda)

I just don't know what's going to happen now. I'm afraid we might have to go deep underground. But I shouldn't fret too much. We have an emergency plan for just such a scenario. I can't go into great detail, but have you ever seen the movie "The Stepford Wives"? Or do you remember the FemBots in the Austin Powers movies? Our contingency plan is based on that model. I guess I'm going to have to go shopping soon for dresses with Peter Pan collars, and Mary Jane shoes. A few years of that should lull everyone into thinking that there is no threat from uppity women who don't know their place.

So, John McCain, you get the temporary victory in this battle [she said as she stroked her cat], with your formidable anti-feminist Sarah Palin weapon. You've made me angry, and when Beth gets angry, Sheeba gets upset. And when Sheeba gets upset, people DIE!* But rest assured, the war continues. We won't give up, Mr. McCain. We'll be right here, watching you, and our struggle will go on!

*This is a joke. An Austin Powers reference, to be specific.