LFA

I don't know if you all saw my friend Dan's comment, so I wanted to make sure you did:

Beth, your blog item about me and the pic and life at Ball State was too cool and a great birthday treat! I figured your entry would be short and sweet. Silly me! The entry was great! And just as cool as the photo and entry were all the friendly comments from your friends about my birthday. The coincidence of my birthday and the photo and your entry have left me nearly speechless! To all who wished me a happy birthday, thank you Big Time.

-dan(Formerly Guido;Currently CatManDude)

Thanks from me, too, for the nice birthday wishes for my friend. He got to see what a nice bunch you are. Hmm, he's a journalism major, maybe I can get him to start writing a blog...!

Do you all remember when we heard Karl Rove speak at the Economics Club dinner a while back? I wrote that even though it was Rove, it was pretty interesting, and I managed to not implode. Well, I had a note from Ken this morning that he got a pair of tickets for the next speaker, this Wednesday: Mike Huckabee.

If it seems like it's all about Republican speakers at this club, that's only because they can't have speakers who are currently in office, so there's a cycle of when an administration comes to an end, they get those speakers. Next year they're hoping to get Pres. Bush, and then Condi Rice. When the Clinton administration came to an end, they had Pres. Clinton and other Democrats. (I think before he announced he was running for President, they had Barack Obama.) It's definitely a conservative bunch, but they make it clear that they are nonpartisan, at least as far as choosing speakers.

I think I'll enjoy hearing Huckabee speak. I hear he's a pretty good speaker, and he impressed me a couple of times during the primaries. (When talking about allowing children of illegal immigrants to go to school, some of his fellow candidates said, in effect, no way, and Huckabee said, "We [the country] are better than that.") I'm also very pleased that this is happening just a couple of weeks before the election. It will be interesting to get his take on it. He has to know that things aren't looking good for their guy. Let's just hope the food isn't barfy this time, but I'm not going to get my hopes up!

Speaking of "their guy," I saw a video this morning of FoxNews's Chris Wallace interviewing McCain. Wallace asked him if he thought the choice of Sarah Palin was dragging down the campaign, or something like that. McCain said no, absolutely not, and "as a cold political calculation, I could not be more pleased." He went on to say that "she's a direct counterpoint to the liberal feminist agenda for America."

Dammit! He figured us out! For years, my sistahs and I have managed to keep our liberal feminist agenda (heretofore known as LFA) under the radar, but that crafty John McCain somehow infiltrated our ranks and now he's telling everyone about the LFA! Darn you, John McCain! [shaking fist] We would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you and your meddling!

This could ruin everything. All my early work with my great-niece might now be for naught. I started when she was just tiny, whispering things in her ear as she lay in her crib...things like, "Equal pay for equal work" and "Girls can be scientists." And it was working, too--she wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up. As soon as she got old enough to officially join the club, I was going to get my free toaster oven! (For each one we "turn," we get a toaster oven.) I've been trying to spread the word (quietly, of course), and I was doing so well that I was getting close to reaching LEFA status! (Liberal ELITE Feminist Agenda)

I just don't know what's going to happen now. I'm afraid we might have to go deep underground. But I shouldn't fret too much. We have an emergency plan for just such a scenario. I can't go into great detail, but have you ever seen the movie "The Stepford Wives"? Or do you remember the FemBots in the Austin Powers movies? Our contingency plan is based on that model. I guess I'm going to have to go shopping soon for dresses with Peter Pan collars, and Mary Jane shoes. A few years of that should lull everyone into thinking that there is no threat from uppity women who don't know their place.

So, John McCain, you get the temporary victory in this battle [she said as she stroked her cat], with your formidable anti-feminist Sarah Palin weapon. You've made me angry, and when Beth gets angry, Sheeba gets upset. And when Sheeba gets upset, people DIE!* But rest assured, the war continues. We won't give up, Mr. McCain. We'll be right here, watching you, and our struggle will go on!

*This is a joke. An Austin Powers reference, to be specific.