Sunday, December 20, 2009

Wrapped and wiped

Scissors I mostly wanted to play Rock Band tonight (yeah...I'm addicted), but figured I'd better buckle down and wrap some shit.

So I spent a couple of hours doing that.

Good times. For whatever reason, wrapping is just not fun for me. Maybe it's because one year, I spent an entire fucking day wrapping presents for three people, and by the end of the day, I just wanted to scissor off my own head. Maybe I have PTWD.

At least I got most of it done tonight, but I tell you, it's exhausting for me. I enjoy giving presents, but with each snip and fold, each attempt to make a crisp pleat and neat end, it's like a little part of me dies. I didn't cry, but I felt like a laborer at the Triangle Factory looking for a way out during the conflagration. Yeah, it's just about that bad for me.

You know, I could write some more stuff about how the Colts are now the only unbeaten team in the league, or about today's trials and tribulations with Rock Band, or about how I was a good girl and did my workout today, or about my new T-shirt (oh, just you wait...!), but I just don't have it in me tonight. I'm not sure I could get fired up if Palin herself came knockin' on my door and told me she had a bone to pick with me.

Nahhh, you know I'd get fired up for that. [limbering up my ass-kickin' leg] Hey, I forgot to mention that I had a visit here the other day from Wasilla, Alaska. That was pretty funny. I wonder if it was friend or foe?

I'm off to Snoozeville soon. Who knew that wrapping was so hazardous to your health? Or at least to your mental well-being?


  1. Gee, Beth! Why not just use gift boxes and bags instead?

    I can't wrap to save my life, so I use those whenever possible....

  2. I was just going to write what I see Timothy above has said !!! Never mind at least it is all done now and you can relax tomorrow...
    Sybil x

  3. Gift wrapping is a ritual best practices under a shroud of drunkeness!

    I hope you were sufficiently shrouded!

  4. Wrapping is much easier if you can avoid swallowing the scissors.

  5. OK, I'll bite. Where did you find the radiograph?

  6. Post Traumatic Wrapping Disorder ANd The Triangle Shirtwaist Factory Fire?
    Love the connection!

  7. i hate wrapping too. I always make the hubby do it. I do a terrible job of it too. I hope you have a happy Sunday. XOXO

  8. I agree with Maddie. Put on some festive tunes, crack open a bottle, or two if you've got lots of presents, drink one wrap two. Then slowly move toward drink two wrap one. By the end, it won't matter if the creases are straight. Keep your eye on the prize. You want to hide the gift not embalm it. The embalming part is for you! Keep them separate....but equal....
    Happy Holidays.

  9. I used to love wrapping (ducks the flying tape) and that was back when my daughter had toys galore in all different weird angles to wrap. I was one of those people who actually hot glued holly and bayberry on the package.

    But (always that isn't there). I didn't have a houseful of cats back then either. You won't find a single bow on any of my gifts. The cats chew on them and I won't tell you what it's like to wake up with colorful gak all over the house.

    These days there is less and less to wrap and honestly without being able to hear Christmas music it's a bore.

    You have me beat though. I haven't wrapped a single gift yet. (Hugs)Indigo

  10. Our good intentions to use the gift baggies fell by the wayside, only five used (four more than last year though :o) Today, I will do the little shits (stocking stuffers).


I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you?